Just in Case

Can you survive if your heart stops beating?

He was, amazing? That didn't seem quite right. Gorgeous? Still not adequate. My brain went fuzzy. My heart stopped. My stomach leapt into my throat and sat there. Everything failed me in that moment. I no longer remembered what I was doing or where I had been headed. All I knew was him. He was wonderfully tall. The kind of tall that if we were to ever stand toe to toe I'd have to tip my head all the way back to look him in the eye. Which is surprising for me since I'm 5'6. His hair was a rich, dark chocolate brown with blonde highlights at the tips. He had it spiked, standing on end, and that only added to his height making him look impressively taller. I found myself wondering how thick his hair actually was and if I touched it, without all the gel, how silky it would feel. His round eyes matched his hair and were tucked under equally dark brows. He was currently studying the freezer he was facing placing carton after carton of popsicles and ice cream  into the case. His long arms were wrapped in lean muscle which flexed each time he lifted the boxes to put them into the freezer. I knew my mouth had to be hanging agape as I studied him. I'd had plenty of crushes on guys before, but I had never experienced this specific feeling. The sensation of your heart falling out of your chest into a pool desire, yearning, adoration, and angst at your feet. His feet. He turned toward his cart of inventory reaching for more ice cream and popsicle boxes. I couldn't help but stare. His face was all angles and plains complimented by a sharp nose and full mouth. I looked for any sign of head phones thinking he was so focused because he was listening to music or something. But he wasn't. He was diligently stacking box after box onto the shelves and I could help but wonder what was going on in that beautiful head of his. He had the style I liked too. He dressed like a skater, which I was. He had on a black shirt, loose denim jeans, and black skater shoes. He fit the part of my dream guy perfectly. He never looked up though. Never looked up to notice me falling apart on the other side of the meat cooler. And there was no way I'd ever be brave enough to go talk to him. He probably had a girlfriend anyways. That, or he would never be interested in a girl like me. I sighed through my nose and turned towards my parents. I handed my mom the hamburger meat that she'd asked for and when she asked me what I was staring at I lied and told her I thought I had seen someone I knew, and just like that it was over. The moment faded and I was back to just being Amber. The girl with the double life. As we rounded our way toward the dairy section I heard people calling my name and making obnoxious noises. I knew from the voice (and the noises) that Chel and Steve had made it to the store. I watched her as she approached wearing just jeans and a tshirt. Chel could make anything look amazing. I, too, was wearing jeans and my favorite Bam Margera shirt, but rather than do my hair or put on make up, I'd put my hair into a pony tail and called it a day. I looked gross compared to her. As she got closer she and Steve greeted my parents and talked for a little. I was itching to leave. It had been long enough. Eventually I kissed my mom's cheek and we began making our way over to the hair dye. In order to do so we would have to walk directly past the freezer section, and my heart where I left it on the floor earlier.
"What the hell's the matter with you?" Chel asked. She wasn't being harsh or mean, that was just how she talked.
"There's a guy over in the freezer section. He's freaking hot. I can't walk over there." I was panicking. He was beautiful and I was a disgusting mess. I suddenly wished I looked like one of those petite, sexy Emo girls on MTV. But instead I was stuck looking like, well, me.
"You should go talk to him." Chel said as we neared the freezer section.
"Are you kidding? I look gross." I said, giving voice to one of the ten million doubts running through my mind.
"Steve and I'll go talk to him. I can get his number for you." Chel looked as me. Mischief twinkled in her eyes. I had known Chel long enough that I knew when she smiled like that, and her eyes glittered like that, there was no way you could stop what she was going to do.
"Arguing with you is going to be a waste of time isn't it?" I asked blandly.
"Stay here." Was all she said as she and Steve took a sharp right turn down the ice cream aisle, and never looked back.