A Child for Christmas

Chapter 11.

Haru

After we all ate breakfast, Seth walked outside to talk to his sister. He left the sliding door cracked. I could hear everything he was saying, and it didn't sound too pretty. From what I picked up she doesn't want him staying with a stranger and he's trying to convince her that he's better off here. I wasn't even sure if he was better off here. He gets a automatic job and home, but he doesn't get to have his family. He may not need it, but will Jeremey grow up being distant to his family? I shook the thoughts from my head, realizing that it wasn't that serious. They would always be able to visit, and I will make sure that Jeremy has the best childhood he possibly can while living here. They may only be here a month or two, and that's okay, because even if they move I'll still have a connection to them. I'll be able to see them often and I'm sure Seth would keep in contact. If things go the way I want them to I might even have something resembling a relationship with Seth. 

He  walked back inside rubbing the bridges of his nose. He had pulled his hair back into a low ponytail with no strands hanging. It made him look tough and cold. I was almost afraid to walk over and comfort him. I still didn't exactly walk over to him, but I did offer to take them to get something sweet. He declined, and I tried to ask him about me buying gifts for Jeremy. That seemed to irritate him further. He proceeded to walk up the stairs. I didn't even know what I said wrong. I sat on the couch bringing my knees to my chest. How did I irritate him? I thought today was going to be a good day. 

I allowed a random series on Netflix to play while Jeremy played on my computer. It's Christmas Eve and it doesn't even feel like it. I wanted today to be jolly and eventful. It has been eventful, I guess. I stared at the bulbs on the Christmas tree remembering how happy Jeremy was when he placed them on there. We were all in good spirits that day, I wish I could make them that happy again. What did I even do? I sighed, slouching into the couch. Should I try to make things delightful again? What if I make it worse?  

Seth came down and placed a hand on my shoulder. I looked up towards him, seeing him move his head in a way that indicated that I should follow. Jeremy ignored us since the headphones in his ears blocked out most of our noise. I hope the child doesn't go deaf. It's probably not as loud as I assume it to be. Seth and I sat on the stairway. I didn't say anything. I didn't know if I was supposed to. "I misbehaved earlier". I still didn't say anything, I just looked down at my toes. "I didn't mean to be rude, I just ..." He sighed and leaned his head on the wall. 

This time he spoke with a little more confidence. "My sister is good at bringing out my insecurities, and she just pointed out the whole charity case. I know that's not what this is, but I can't help but feel that way. When you brought up the gifts, I don't know I just ... I was already insecure about it". I didn't say anything for a while, he didn't either. 

"I won't buy gifts if you don't want me to. I was just raised to give. I'm not trying to treat you like you're less or have less than me. This is just the way I am. I don't know any other way". I was conflicted as I said it. I didn't know if I could stop myself from trying to find something to give as a gift. 

"I can't give anything back right now." I tried to interrupt but he just talked over me. "We just met and I'd prefer that you don't give us gifts. If we're still here in March for Jeremy's Birthday then you can get gifts then". I felt it was a fair compromise. He took my hand and squeezed it tightly before walking into the living room. It made me giddy inside, and this time I truly did enjoy it. They were staying, maybe even until March, and I had a chance of being in a content relationship. Maybe I crave to give too much. Maybe that's why my ex thought I could be a perfect sub, I don't know. What I do know is that I'm glad that their car broke down those few days ago and landed them in my house. 

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The last chapter will be tomorrow.