My eyes slowly opened to the sun shining through my window, dully lighting up my dim room. I didn't want to get out of bed. Saturday's are hard for me, that's always our day.
Was. I mean was our day. I still had a hard time coming to terms with it. It had been a month since I last heard from you.
I think we need time. I can't tell you how many times that last text broke my heart. Or how many times I tried to just drink it away. I wish that it was more permanent than a mere few hours. But as my mother always said, "if wishes were fishes darling, we'd all be fried."
Drinking. I couldn't decide if it sounded good or repulsive at the moment. My stomach churned at the thought of another hang over, but my heart begged me just to forget. But my head knew better. My head knew I would just wake up loving you again, no matter how much alcohol was consumed. It wasn't a cure, just a bandaid.
Unless... The thought had crossed my mind more than I care to admit. The thought of ending it all. But it always went after it came. I'd tried and failed many times, seems I didn't have enough will to even do that. It's not like anyone noticed anyway. And if they had, they didn't have anything to say about the missing whiskey or how we ran out of pain killers so quickly. Not that it matters; I'm still here.
Pulling myself out of bed with a sigh, my eyes lingered on the phone laying on my pillow. Should I call you? Probably not. You wouldn't answer had your life depended on it. Not only that, but I didn't want to know who you were spending our day with.
The truth is a hard pill to swallow, and I wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then.
YOU ARE READING
Broken
RandomThe only ones awake at three in the morning are the drunk, the lonely, and the in love. It's common that it's all three.
