Hey. I knew it was you before I picked up my phone. Even though I hadn't heard from you since our fight, I knew you'd be back. You probably went to her first though, but my anger over that was gone. I was numb, I couldn't feel anything.
What do you want. Only three months ago, this is what I said when you texted asking for me back.
11:34 PM. I'm sorry. For today, for everything. I don't want to lose you again. Liar. You don't want me, you want to use me so you aren't alone because I'm the only one who won't leave when they see how ugly you are on the inside. We all have our problems don't we?
11:35 PM. I can't do this anymore. You've put me through this one too many times. I'm leaving for good this time. I hesitated before sending it. Did I want to be alone? Losing your toxic grip on me would mean facing loneliness. I had a hard time with loneliness. But I sent it anyways.
11:38 PM. Please don't do this, I'll die without you. What? You've never said that to me before. I mean, you told me you'd been suicidal before but, that can't be what you mean. Right?
11:38 PM. What do you mean? My heart is racing again. I'm scared of your answer. I'm always scared of your answer.
11:41 PM. I mean if I lose you again, I'll kill myself. I can't handle losing you again. I stared blankly at the screen. I know what you said. But I couldn't comprehend it. Did I mean that much to you? Enough for you to take your life because of me? This can't be real. You can't be serious. Right? My gut felt like I someone had wrapped their hand around it and squeezed as hard as they could. You can't be serious.
11:45 PM. Calm down. I won't go anywhere. But I'm serious, no more other girls. I can't live like this. And if you ever lay your hand on me again, I'll have you arrested before you can hurt yourself. At least I sound confident. But now I'm trapped. If I leave and he does something, now it's my fault. His blood is on my hands.
11:46 PM. Thank you baby, I promise you won't regret this. In the back of my head, I knew I would.
YOU ARE READING
Broken
RandomThe only ones awake at three in the morning are the drunk, the lonely, and the in love. It's common that it's all three.
