ambivalent [alex karev]

i. in which she is pursued

"Fucking hell. Shit, shit, shit." I yank on my pants, buttoning them in panic and frantically running a comb through my hair. My hazel eyes blink in protest as I jab a mascara wand at them blindly. Tripping over my feet, I scream at my roommate, Cress.

    "You didn't think to wake me up why?"

    "You looked so cute asleep, Char."

    "Hmm, maybe an internship is more important than being cute? Just a thought." She shoves a cup of coffee into my hands, leaning on the kitchen counter with a smirk on her face.

    "Has anyone ever told you you care too much?" I roll my eyes, pressing a kiss on her forehead. I may be furious at her, but tradition still stands. Scalding my tongue on the steaming coffee, I gasp and practically throw the cup down on the table.

    "God, Crescent, you're gonna kill me." She shoves me out the door.

    "Good luck at Seattle Grace!"

    The lock of my car beeps as I fly up the steps of Seattle Grace. My throat goes dry as I stare up the halls of the hospital. People whirl around me, the screaming and beeping and running making me feel tinier. Of course, it was nothing compared to what was going on in my head. Doubts wrestled with self-deprecation for dominance, and I swallow hard when I realize the time.

    Fingers fumbling, I can't seem to tie the blue strings of my garb together. Two, three times I fail and finally a kind soul steps in. No words are exchanged. Turning around, my eyes meet with the dark ones of an Asian woman. First impression? Stubborn, smart and strong. Hard to win over, but I know I will.

    "Cristina Yang."

    "I'm Charlotte Sweeney. Thank you. I'm intimidated, nervous and I-I'm sorry."

    "Trust me, I am too. Follow the textbook and everything will be fine, right?" she chews at her lip. My eyes crease with sympathy and then the rest of the interns and I are swept away. Packed like sardines, I strain to catch the resident's words. I've been assigned to who some people call the Nazi? Pushed to the front of the group, I stumble onto someone's foot.

    "Watch it." she clips. I spring back, antagonized.

    "Sorry?" I bite my lip, already feeling the competition. A hand cups my ass, and I jump forward. God. at this rate, I'm never going to hear a thing she says. Turning my head, I'm met with a smug face, gleaming eyes and a smirk I want to slap off their face.

    "Firm. I like it." he whispers in my ear. I gag audibly, blood simmering.

    "Touch me again and you'll be down a few fingers, babe." I spit.

"Cute. You think you're strong."

     "Wanna know what's totally cute? Being an absolute fuckwad." I seethe in front of him. His scruff tickles my neck and my hand flies back and shoves him off of me. Bailey, my resident, calls my name.

    "Sweeney! Are you listening or do you want to be blacklisted on your first day?" she barks at me. Snapping up, I scramble.

    "Yes, Dr. Bailey, I'm listening."

    "That's what I thought. Yang, you're labs, O'Malley, you're on workups, Grey, you're in charge of getting Katie Bryce a CT, and Stevens, you can do rectal exams! Oh, Sweeney. Book an OR for Jacin Clay. You're his doctor."

    Grey was the snappy one, I realize. Her stormy eyes remind me of freezing currents. Stevens is drop dead gorgeous, and O'Malley looks fine, I guess. Gentle? Gay? Realizing we're all still standing here, I hesitate.