Nebraska Stars

Chapter Eight

"So is he hot?" Jo said later that night when I called. I was lying on my new bed, staring up at the ceiling and trying to wish myself back home. 

"I guess."  

"So? Give me details! What does he look like?"  

"I can't really get into it right now, Jo." I got up and grabbed my suitcase, heaved it onto the bed, and unzipped it. On top of all my clothes was a framed picture of mom and me that she must have shoved in at the last minute. It was one of my favorites-it had been taken at the dinner we went to after my junior high graduation. Mom and I were squeezed together in a booth and she was pinching my cheeks and grinning for the camera; I was making a get-me-out-of-here face. I smiled remembering that night and my eyes filled with tears for the thousandth time. 

"Hello? Are you listening to me?"  

"Yes. What?" 

"I said, is he tall?" 

"Yes, Jo," I answered, slightly aggravated. "He's tall, he's built, he's got nice eyes, he's smart, he's friendly...and he has a girlfriend." I pulled my clothes out of the suitcase, mostly t-shirts and shorts, nothing like what Hailey had been wearing, that's for sure, and put them away in the bureau. The drawers creaked as I opened and closed them.  

"So what?" 

"So, he has a girlfriend." 

"So?? Mae, mae, mae, you have so much to learn my little padabon." 

"It's padawan." 

"Huh?" I could hear voices at the other end of the line and I wondered where Jo was. 

"It's padaWAN not, padabon. It's from Star Wars." 

"Ok, nerd," she said, and she started giggling uncontrollably. "Jay! Stop it!"  

"What's going on?" 

"Nothing," she said, trying to contain her laughing. 

"I gotta go, Jo." 

"Wait! Wait! I wanted to tell you one thing." 

"What?" 

"Clark misses you." 

"He does not," I said. I thought of Clark with his ugly trucker hat and his hand rolled cigarettes. He was nothing like Hank. But still, it felt good to get attention from a guy. "What'd he say about me?" 

"Oh-well, he didn't SAY anything. I can just tell," she said, still laughing at something Jay was doing, probably ticking her. 

"Ugh, I'm hanging up now." 

"Love you!" 

I hung up and immediately dialed my mom. As the phone began to ring, I thought of all the things I wanted to say to her-get me out of here being top on my list. But, when she answered her voice sounded so distant and sad, it scared me a little.  

"Are you ok, mom?" I asked, wanting some reassurance. 

"Oh yes, honey. It's just been a hard day, that's all. A long day." 

"Well why? Tell me about it." I crossed the room and stood by the window. It was completely dark now, but I could see the stars. They were so much brighter and more brilliant than they had ever been at my house in Evanston. Alan told me that the light from the city makes it harder to see the stars, and now I could see that he was right. They were beautiful, and magical. 

"I don't want to talk about this with you." Her voice took on a hard edge then, which made me bristle.  

"You can't send me away for the summer mom, and make me live with strangers, and not tell me anything. I'm obviously going to find out eventually, so why don't you just talk to me now?" I was angry and I couldn't hold back the emotion of the day anymore. Tears streamed down my cheeks and my voice got shrill and shaky. "I don't know anyone here, mom. I have no way to get around. What am I supposed to do?"