Nebraska Stars

Chapter Thirteen

I awoke only a few hours later when it was still pitch black outside. I heard a car door slam and I tiptoed over to my window and watched as Fiona walked to the passenger side of her car, opened the door, and pulled Ben out. He was clearly drunk, so drunk he could hardly stand up straight. She threw Ben's arm around her shoulder and struggled to help him walk to the house, bending under his weight, stopping every few seconds to readjust. 

Whoa, I thought. Someone else probably would have thought it was funny, but the sight frightened me. I heard the screen door creak open, Fiona's key turning in the lock, and then they were inside, their voices muffled but with an easily discernible tension.  

I crossed my room and opened the door a crack, trying to make out what they were saying, but I still couldn't hear them clearly. I felt the slightest twinge of guilt as I tiptoed down the hall and sat at the top of the stairs. I knew I shouldn't be eavesdropping, but I couldn't bring myself to stop. I was sick of being kept in the dark about everything. I perched there, my fingers wrapped tightly around the bannister, and craned my neck to hear, knowing I'd have plenty of time to race back to my room if they started to come up.  

"I can't believe you did this again," I heard Fiona say. Again? "With everything we have going on, I can't handle this right now." 

What did they have going on? Did she mean me? Was I that much of a burden? I felt a little sick to my stomach and thought of running back to my room, but I was frozen in place. 

"It issssn't right," Ben said, his words slurred. "It issssn't right, it issssn't right." He kept repeating it over and over. 

"Well we can't do anything to change it now, can we? We just have to act like everything is fine, and it will be." Fiona's voiced sounded tense and shaky. "God," she added in a hiss. "I can't believe I let Geri talk me into this." 

Geri? My mom? My heart raced as I waited for her to speak again. What the hell is she talking about? I thought. 

"What're you doing?" I jumped when I heard Hank's voice behind me. I turned and looked up to see him standing in the hallway, his body encased in shadow. He was wearing basketball shorts and no shirt. His hair was messy and his eyes were sleepy and half open. I only had a few seconds to decide what to say to him. I was embarrassed to be eavesdropping, but I had to hear what else they were going to say.  

"Shhhh," I said, pointing at the yellow light coming from the kitchen that spilled into the front hall. "Your mom and dad are down there," I whispered. 

He chuckled quietly and grabbed my arm, pulling me up. "We really need to get you a TV," he teased.  

"No!" I planted my feet and turned my head back. "They're talking about me. Your dad is drunk and they're-" 

He put his arm around me and I was distracted for a moment by the feel of his warm bare chest against the side of my body. "Dads will get drunk from time to time," he said, leading me back to my room. "This isn't the first time he's had a few too many after a night in the Vegas tent." We got to the door of my room and he put his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes. He leaned in and whispered into my ear, "Relax." Then he gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. "Go to bed now, we have work to do tomorrow." 

I slipped into my room and listened for Hank's door to close. When it did, I tiptoed back out into the hallway and returned to my spot at the top of the stairs. But now, the kitchen light was off and I didn't hear any voices, just the sounds of a house at night-wind rattling the windows, a ticking mantle clock. Maybe Fiona had put Ben on the couch and he passed out. She must be down there, too. I never heard her come up. I waited, holding my breath, desperate to hear something more. But there was nothing.