Valentine's Day

Chapter 2

                                     

I don't normally take things to heart, we were all friends and teased each other without being mean about it. I don't know what it was about Char's teasing and spilling out my secret in the way she did. I don't like being seen as the girl who's totally into the hearts and romance stuff. Sometimes, I feel like I'm missing out on a crucial part of being a teenager by not being allowed to date. My school work is important to me, but I'm sure I could handle dating someone and still passing all my subjects.

I made the short walk to the bus stop and checked the time table on the stand. I had about twenty minutes to wait for the next bus. I sat down on the seat and shoved my bag on the ground. Digging through my bag I pulled out my iPod and threw on a sad song.

I scrolled through my songs and found "Closer to me" by 5ive. Pop music was probably my ultimate guilty pleasure. It couldn't be any old pop music, it had to be stuff from the late 80's through to the early 00's. That whole time was just pure gold. Not like the computer techno stuff they bring out now, I much prefer the singers who can sing and dance.

I went through my bag again and picked up my book to read while I waited for the bus.

Walking up the drive way to home I went through my bag looking for my house keys. Once I located them under an old chocolate bar wrapper. I let myself inside, putting my things away before grabbing a glass of water and walking out to the backyard.

I went to the back of our property and climbed up our tree. The branches were so thick, they could easily hold four people. Once I was in a comfortable position, looking over the neighbourhood I let myself relax and the tears flowed.

I wasn't entirely sure why I was crying, probably because Char had betrayed my trust and told something so personal. It wasn't as if she broadcast it to the entire school but I just wasn't comfortable with Hawke knowing how much I wanted the flowers and candy, all the things I insisted I despised.

I stayed up in the tree until the sun began to sink beyond the horizon and the stars began to show in the sky. I didn't want to leave but it was getting hard to see to get myself back down and I really didn't want to fall.

I managed to find my feet on solid ground and walked back inside unscathed. I was walking to my room when I heard Char from behind me.

"Oh, good you're home. I was worried when you didn't answer your phone. Star, I'm-"

She didn't get a chance to finish her sentence before I cut her off.

"Char. I don't want to hear it ok. Just leave me alone." I said and continued on my way to my room.

I opened the door to my room and let out a small scream as I noticed someone laying down on my bed.

"I am just so good at making women scream." Came a familiar voice from my bed.

"Maybe it's because you hide out in the dark on their beds without their knowledge."

Now that I knew it was Hawke, I felt a bit more relaxed but my heart was still pounding a million miles a minute. I closed the curtains, leaving the windows open and turned on the light. Walking over to my bed I sat on the edge facing Hawke. He was still on my bed, head resting on my pillow.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"What do you think I'm doing here? I was worried about you, it's not like you to get annoyed with Char and it's not like you to ignore your phone."

"I left my phone in my bag and I was outside. How was I supposed to know you were trying to contact me?"

"You should know that I care."

There were no sunglasses now, his eyes bored right into mine. I jumped a little at the intensity. I got off my bed and walked over to the middle of my room.

"Well, I'm sorry for making you worry. You can see I'm ok, so you can go now."

I crossed my arms over my chest and turned away from him, staring at the curtains and wishing I'd left one window open so I could see out. I felt so enclosed right now, so trapped.

He was quiet, he moved so fast that I hadn't noticed he was right behind me until he put his arms on my waist and turned me around to face him. I stared down at the floor not wanting to look him in the eye. He tilted my chin up so I was forced to look into his eyes.

"What's going on? You're clearly not ok."

A slow tear left my eye and fell down my cheek. A betraying tear. I gave a shrug.

"I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong." He said as he lightly traced his finger over my cheek wiping away my tear. I looked up into his eyes, not worried about what he could see in mine but searching for what I could see in his. Concern, definitely concern and something else. My gaze travelled down to his mouth, those soft lips that I've kissed before and often fantasied about kissing again. My heart began racing faster, as if it was trying to escape, grow wings and fly out of my chest. I kept looking into his eyes, him looking back into mine and he pulled me a bit tighter moving me closer to him. His hand was cupping my face and he leaned in closer to me.

He was going to kiss me and I wanted him to. I closed my eyes in in anticipation and felt his lips lightly brushing against mine.

That's when my door opened and all hell broke loose.

"Savannah Jane Steadman what the hell do you think you're doing?" my mother's angry, booming voice filled the room and Hawke and I sprang apart.

"Yikes. I better go." Hawke said as he let go of me and pushed passed my mum on his way out the door.

"What do you think you're doing, Savannah? You know you're not allowed boys up here. Certainly not that boy. He was the worst reputation of the lot."

I sighed. Mum was on a roll. I had no idea where she got her information from. Maybe it was true but she just had no idea.

"Don't sigh at me Savannah. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

She was still yelling and I was still trying to process the fact that Hawke and I had nearly kissed! Not that I'd be looking back on this moment with any fond memories.

"I'm sorry." I tried to be as contrite as possible even though I felt the opposite.

"You know you're not allowed male company up here. We have rules in this house. Do they not apply when I'm not home?"

"No, mum. They apply." I responded. I was fighting the urge not to roll my eyes and sigh again. You'd think we'd been half naked or something the way she was going on.

She continued on her tirade for twenty minutes. I know because I kept check on my phone. While I was paying attention of course. By the time she finished I felt both emotionally exhausted and exhausted in general. I just wanted to sleep for eternity. She left me in my room to "think about what I'd done." Which meant I just got changed into my pajamas and fell asleep.