Friends A to Z

Dear Friend A

Althea looks at the clock, still dressed in her Sunday clothes. She does not bother with taking them even though they were becoming uncomfortable to laze around in. She groans at the time for not moving fast enough. She grabs her phone for the tenth time, but there was nothing there. No messages, no calls, she feels like she is being ignored. 

Back in her room, she sits on her bed pensively. Time ticks away, slowly counting down the minutes that William will return from work. The desk peers at her as if luring her to sit and write. She sees the stack of blank paper just sitting there on the desktop underneath the small light blue lamp that hovers over them. She figures that now was a time as good as any to finish what she started, or else keep getting bugged by the idea until death.

She slides off her bed and moves into the chair at her desk. She stares at her paper. The idea was there bouncing around, but the words however were not. She takes her phone and puts on her favorite song. While many of her friends questioned her taste in music for her love of J-pop and J rock. She never gave another thought.. Next to Gospel, it was also her inspiration and made her wonder how far she could push the her own limits. If Gospel was her foundation, then J-pop was her rock.

She closes her eyes, letting the music consume her, then begins to write the words that has been kept behind the bars in her mind.

Dear Friend A,

To my precious Ahlai,

First, I would like to say Thank you, for just being my friend even though I was just some random stranger on the internet. Never before would I have thought that I would ever meet someone like you, out of a one in seven billion chance. We were honestly the lucky ones. At the time, we were two people just looking for understanding, for someone to grasp what we were going through without having to say a word. Two very similar yet different people. 

To you I write my confessions, that for the longest time I had a crush on you. I was ever so crazy about you. You were the reason everyone believed that I was addicted to my phone, when in all honesty I was addicted to you. You told me everything of yourself. Your joys, your sorrows. You shared nobody would dare to. You deemed me trustworthy and I felt that I had to live up to that no matter what. I wanted to continue to be there for you and wished that could hold you in person. I fell for you, fell for you hard. But when you told me that you were seeing someone, I knew that I had to give up fantasy for reality.

With the new situation, I will admit that I have become afraid of what is to come, and I don't want to leave you all alone in this world not without saying everything I need to.  I wanted you to know that you are the most amazing person that I have ever had the pleasure of chatting with. If there was one thing that I could ever wish for, it is to meet you in person and spend some much valuable time together. You were my biggest crush, the one that made me yearn for everything you are. It may feel weird hearing this confession even now and even though I have found another who I do love and hold dear. You still have a place on my heart. 

I just want you to know, that no matter how hard things get, that I am there for you. Whether I am  thousands of miles away or  no longer on this Earth, I am with you and will do my best in any way to comfort you, and show you that the world is not so bad. I would do anything for you. Don't give up. Don't ever give up. I won't be able to forgive or myself if you do. You are talented, amazing and beautiful. If anyone tells you otherwise, just remember my words. You're my most important treasure, and no one can ever take that from you.

With love, forever yours

Althea

As she signs her name, Althea realizes that she had been crying the whole letter through. Still, it was hard to find the right words to say that would describe how she felt. She looks at the paper not knowing whether to toss it and start over, or keep it. She picks it up, staring at the fragile paper. She places it back down, setting it on desk. She decides to keep it just as it was. She checks the clock. Not much time had passed since she had started writing, only an hour. She looks back down thinking about adding more to the letter. 

"Shouldn't force it," She mumbles to herself. She gets up from the desk and walks backwards to her bed. She falls onto it, sinking into the soft mattress. She closes her eyes taking a short nap.