Pokemon Ash X Reader - Hateful Love

66. So Hard To Face

(Your POV)

I still remember how we met, everything

"Let's go" Iris said

Everything . . . 

"(Y/N) . . .?" She repeated though I was not listening

Every little moment of us 

"Let's go out walking" She said

"Fine" I said

From my origin . . .

Boy . . . 

You looked so . . .

Wait . . . 

You've changed . . . A LOT!

When we were in Kanto and Johto, you were   funny, immature, hyper-active, a fool, a clumsy fool, a cute idiotic dork. my dork . . . 

In Hoenn, you were still that same Ash but got a little bit mature and in Sinnho you got more mature

In Unova you turned back to normal Ash because of Iris who was pretty much like Misty

At the start in Kalos, though you were excited, you turned mature, cool, but still you were not idiotic dork, you were adventurous . . . 

And when she came you became something else

You turned your face from me 

We were now in a Park, walking

"(Y/N), are you OK?" Iris asked worried

I nodded

But now all those memory seem painful yet precious 

They make me sad but happy 

At least I did't gave you my 1st kiss . . . and I'm glad 

You left me, and now I can't see you anymore. 

You walked away, and left me there

You turned your face, walked away but stay 

In my mind there are still memories about you

Those prints seem permanent 

I don't care anymore do I?

So just go and turn away, go until I can't see you anymore

Walk away, 'cause I don't care

You did the same thing 

'Cause . . . 

Each time I gave you chance

You just broke my heart more 

So now what's your next thing to say? 

I have nothing to lose 

Since I've already lost you 

But still . . . 

So hard to accept that I won't be with you anymore 

So hard to face, that we can't be together anymore

Please walk away, so I never remember you 

Go away, but stay 

Just . . .

Turn Your Face 

"You know you're looking brighter than ever" Iris said

"Maybe I know why" I said smiling

"Why?" She asked

"Because I've given upon Ash" I said confidently 

"Tell that to me a week later" She said

"Bet me" I said still confident

"To much confident" She said crossing her arms

"I am" I said smiling confidently and crossing my arms too

"Tell me" She said in a tone

"I've decided . . . " I said keeping her in suspense

"What?" She asked

"That I will wait for him, I'm not lingering after him, I will be just who I am, if he comes than good if he not than nice" I said "At past I would either focus on breaking or patching but now I'm in the center, I don't care, I will not even propose him, but I would just see him like a secret lover, I would sing about him, admit I love him, but I will not show it, the game is on Iris" 

"Beat it" She said ans we both laughed

In my memory, all the small things, like daggers in my mind
In my memory, while my head bleeds, the words I'll never find
That I always meant to say to you I can't  

Cause you turned your face, and now I can't feel you anymore
Turn your face, so now I can't see you anymore
Walk away until you're not standing at my door
Turn your face, walk away and stay  

In my memory, I was hurting, long before we met, oh
In my memory, there's still burning, fingerprints you left
And I'll always meant to say to you I can't  

So just turn your face, until I can't see you anymore
Turn your face, until I can't see you anymore
Walk away until you're not standing at my door
Turn your face, walk away and stay  

Each time I take you back
You bring one thousand cracks
And I accept them, like a fool oh  

So now what's your excuse
What do we have to lose
Since I'm already losing you  

So hard to face, that I can't feel you anymore
Hard to face, that I can't see you anymore
So walk away, until you're not standing at my door
Turn your face, walk away, and stay  

Turn your face
Turn your face, and stay

Turn your face . . .