Dragon Knight-Commander (A Cullen Rutherford Shapeshifter Romance)

Chapter 9

'A holiday?' said Josephine. She scribbled down my request on her clipboard as was her habit. Her gaze flickered from Leliana to Maxwell and back to me.

'How long for?' asked Leliana.

I felt my cheeks burn. Leliana was shrewd. Varric joked she could unlock all the secrets in your brain by looking into your soul and sometimes I wondered if that was true.

'A month or so?' I said.

I didn't want to burn my bridges. One of the main reasons I'd stayed so long was because I had a home here, a job, friends, people I liked, people that liked me. I'd seen a lot of Thedas on my travels and the Skyhold community was very sophisticated compared to many of the communities we'd helped or visited.

If I found no answers in Eden, coming back here would be a good option to have. Perhaps my only option because let's face it, I didn't have any useful skills apart from the ability to hypnotise darkspawn. My healing and fighting talents were nothing to write home about. The fact that I could write a compelling press release was not going to get me very far in Thedas - even if I could get my head around their alien alphabet and learn to read and write.

A month sounded reasonable. I could send them a message after a month and explain I wanted to travel to Eden and wouldn't be returning. Or if travelling alone turned out to be a really bad idea, I could come back and rethink my strategy. It seemed pointless to tell them I was going to Eden, not just because it was an epic journey but because Cullen had been pretty firm that he wouldn't allow it. And he was used to getting what he wanted.

'Are you leaving the Inquisition, My Lady?' said Leliana in her soft way, that had a thread of steel running through it. Straight to the point, like she'd read my brain.

Maxwell uncrossed his arms and said, 'Cat, you're a free agent, but a whole month...'

I released a shaky breath. I needed enough gold for at least a month to get me started. I couldn't beg my way around Thedas. 'I don't want to leave you guys in the lurch but has it ever occurred to you that you were fighting darkspawn just fine before I came along? Sure, it's more difficult without me but you're all so...so fierce and capable. Solas or Vivienne or Dorian can freeze darkspawn with their staffs. I don't see how I make such a big difference.'

Joshephine gasped. 'You have made all the difference. With your power over the spawn, the Inquisition has obtained backing from key nobles across Orlais and Feralden. Money is pouring in. The civil war will end soon. The Heralds have united everyone against the blight.'

'Aggressive magic is being seen as positive, rather than something to be feared. Mages aren't as vilified any more, Cat. Because of you,' Maxwell said.

Leliana gripped the table and leant towards me. 'Because of both of you. Along with the Inquisitor, the Right Hand is seen as a saviour sent from the Maker herself.' She pointed to an area on the war map and stuck a flag on it. 'If rumours  from here about the Grey Wardens being controlled by Samson are true, we think your ability will help us conquer them while saving as many soldiers' lives as possible. I had new information from one of my spies about this fort yesterday and we need to make a decision.' She looked at me through her lashes. 'Any idea when the Commander will be back?'

I shook my head.

She sighed. 'The Inquisitor's right. You are a free agent. Once we have a strategy in place, if you need a break we will of course provide you with soldiers -'

'No thanks, I sort of need a break from them too.'

'Your companions then. The Inquisitor.'

'Just me, my horse, a map and some gold.' One of the many sentences I found myself saying and wanting to giggle about. If only Darren could see me now.

Josephine wrung her hands. 'Right Hand. Cat, can we discuss this when the Commander returns? It's too important a decision for the War Council to make without his input. Particularly if we need to plan this attack on Samson.'

'I was hoping to leave tomorrow,' I said in a small voice. 'Anyway, I think the Commander won't agree to it.'

Leliana snorted softly on a laugh. 'He's always saying we shouldn't push you so hard, so I wouldn't worry about that. I don't think he'll agree to you going unescorted though. Are you planning to  just roam around like a wandering elf?'

Yes. 'Unless you can suggest a nice place to stay?'

They looked a little bewildered. I wondered if holidays were even a thing here on Thedas.

'So if you could just give me some gold please. I'll be off first thing tomorrow,' I said firmly. 

'You can't wait a day or two more until the Commander returns?'Josephine pressed me.

'No, sorry. I need a break now. It's not up to him.'

Josephine smiled. I could see her mind whirring, pulling out all the diplomatic stops, searching for the right thing to say to get me to agree. 'But the imminent fight against the Grey Wardens will be up to him. He alone knows what troops he can pull in from where without grave consequences. He can give you a rough idea of when you should be back.'

I felt a throbbing in my head when I remembered Cullen as a dragon and felt the urge to throw up. I rubbed my temples feeling exhausted. 'He won't say I can go, I'd rather leave before he gets back.' Before I have to look at him again.

Leliana and Josephine exchanged speaking glances. Maxwell walked to me and put his arm around my shoulders. He squeezed. 'You have my word, Cat and as Inquisitor I have the final decision - you have my word that you can leave and the Inquisition will provide for all your needs. I am just begging you to wait till we've consulted with him first.'

I felt sick thinking of Cullen gobbling up sheep, druffalos or people. Of his friends trapping villagers and roasting them in their beds. I wanted to block it out and leave it behind. But I also needed to keep these people onside, so I said, 'Fine. But I request that you will let me leave without delay when you have spoken to him.'

Maxwell gave me another squeeze and said. 'I promise. Now how about coming for that ride with me and getting out of Skyhold for the day?'