after sunset | ᴮᵀˢ × ᴶᴴˢ

十一

The colors of the sunrise that greeted me, as I opened my eyes, were more than just stunning. I was mesmerized by their beauty immediately. Those beautiful shades of yellow and pink simply gave the world around me a glow that made everything seem more alive than ever.

Even though the sun was just rising, the colors of simply everything seemed to be much more vibrant than usual. I didn't know what 'usual' meant, but it was a feeling deep within me that told me to believe it.

There were some clouds high up in the sky as well, looking like cotton candy as the sun colored them into different kinds of pink and orange. The colors caused the clouds to look like figures, it was really nice to look at. I really enjoyed it, it was soothing my soul.

The street in front of me was deserted, nobody was outside. It was probably too early for everyone since the sun had only started to rise. The street was really long. From the point I was standing at I couldn't see an end. I was sure if I would follow the street I would be on my way for days until I would reach a point on which trying to go any further would be senseless. If there was an end, then it was absolute.

However, there was no reason for me to try to find the end, so I just stayed in the same place, watching the sun rise high into the sky.

At some point I couldn't remember how much time passed since my last thoughts about the end of the street, but the next time I opened my eyes for sure, I saw a silhouette somewhere further away on the street. I couldn't tell what it was, didn't know if it was an animal, an object or a human.

It took my quite some time to realize that it was walking into my direction, and then I just kept on watching until I was able to see who it was.

It was a boy. His arms were covered in blood, and as he was walking further towards me I could also see that he was crying. There were tears streaming down his cheeks and there was nothing but pain and sorrow plastered onto his face.

Something inside me started to scream at me, it told me to run over to him, embrace him and hold him tight against my chest until every single trace of his sadness would be gone. But no matter how hard I tried my legs didn't budge to move.

Why? Why should I've helped him? I didn't know. I didn't know who he was.

Who am I?

The answer was because I cared. I didn't need to know who he was, I just knew I was supposed to help him, but my legs didn't move. So, I kept on waiting for him to arrive in front of me.

As he neared me I could finally see all his features. He was tall, even taller than me and his hair was dark. I couldn't see much of his face as he kept his eyes closed and often wiped his tears away with his hands. While wiping away his tears with his blood covered hands he managed to get blood on his face, but he didn't seem to care.

It didn't take too long until he reached me. He stopped right in front of me, still crying and his head hung down. I reached for him, put my right hand under his chin in order to pull up his face carefully. The tears kept running down his cheeks and he let out quite sobs that managed to tear my heart apart.

I felt guilty, guilty because I didn't know who he was and because I couldn't help him. I had no idea what to do, but the moment he opened his eyes and looked at me with those dark eyes, I just knew that being there with him was a start.

He kept looking at me with those dark eyes that were filled with sadness, but there was something else too: Hope.

His sobs quieted down slowly and as fewer tears came running down his cheeks, I wiped away the remaining tears with the sleeve of my sweater. I also took care of the bloodstains, wiping them away. The boy had a beautiful face, and I noticed it became even more beautiful as a little smile tugged on his lips. I kept looking at him, not understanding what was happening.

"Thank you, hyung." He said, his smile growing bigger. At first I didn't even think about the fact that he obviously knew me due to his adorable smile, which allowed me to see his bunny teeth. He as a whole was adorable. "Thank you for always being there for me." He continued, and with that I finally started to question how it was possible that he knew me, but I obviously had no idea who he was.

I didn't dare to pull away my hands, afraid it would hurt his feelings. I couldn't allow that hopeful glimmer in his eyes to vanish into nothingness.

"Hyung?" he called me, a questioning expression on his face. I immediately felt sorry, but then suddenly he closed his eyes for a while. "You don't know who I am." He stated in a whisper. I felt so terribly guilty, but why?

"I'm sorry for disappointing you." I said, not sure what else I was supposed to say. It took him some time until he opened his eyes again.

"I'm Jungkook." He suddenly stated, ignoring my apology. I was worried to find disappointment in his eyes, but there was none. The hopeful glimmer was still there as well, but the sadness dared to take over again. I was truly worried, but I didn't dare to ask for his pain.

He then suddenly help up his hands, looking down at them as they were still covered in blood.

"You're Hoseok, my hyung, the one who took care of me for all this time we knew each other." He then said and looked back up at me. I bent my head a little to the left, looking at him with a questioning expression.

"Jungkook." I let his name slip past my lips, trying how it would sound with my voice. He smiled a little again and then I smiled a little smile tug on my lips as well.

"Hyung, I'm sorry." He suddenly whispered. I didn't understand at all. What was he talking about? I wanted to ask him, but when I looked into his dark eyes again I could also see that he couldn't speak about it. It hurt him too much, and as I didn't know about what was hurting him, I figured it was wiser to not make him face his pain even more.

"Don't be." I let out instead. He shook his head slightly as an answer and then I suddenly felt his arms around me and his face hidden at my neck. He was crying again, tears dropping onto my skin after they run down his cheeks. I wrapped my arms around his waist, holding him close as his sobs were tearing my hear apart once again.

"Please, don't forget me. Don't forget us." He whispered between sobs. I let my head fall against his own and closed my eyes. We stayed like that for quite some time, but when I opened my eyes again, Jungkook was gone.

I let my arms fall down against my sides, but then I brought my left arm back up as I felt a piercing pain on my skin. I pressed my arm against my sweater, panting heavily as I fell onto my knees.

I could barely take the pain and as I pulled back the sleeve of my sweater I could see the reason why: there were six names engraved into my skin, five of them I didn't recognize. I didn't recognize Jungkook's name. All of them were bleeding and then I noticed how the bloodstains from the blood on Jungkook's arms mixed with my own.

It hurt and I just wished for my arm to be cut off as I could barely take the pain. But at least I wouldn't forget about Jungkook.

And I would make sure to find out about the owner of the other names as well, no matter how much it would hurt.