I spend a lot of my time cleaning. I also read a lot. I attempt at art. It's almost like picking up the pieces of fractured dreams. My own, and other's.
"I walk this lonely road, the only road I've ever known..." - Green Day
I have a shadowman who's been around since the abduction. His name is Frankie, or Yohgrey. I love him a lot. He's supposed to be my guardian, but he has a curse on him. He sometimes calls me Mommy. We didn't always get along. We've gotten into some fights. Before I got put on the Haldol, we used to have more conversations. The Haldol I had a severe allergic reaction to. I learned the medications were more harmful than they were good. Ten years I suffered the torture of the mental hospitals, and the doctors, the nurses, and the patient staff. They stole my clothes, my drawings, my stories. They stole things that were precious to me and irreplacable. Collecting my little white lies. People wrote terrible stories about me, casting me as their villain, the one they loved to hate. And with these beings, I am strong. I am taken care of. I appear, to be a referee in a war.
I'm getting glimpses of myself before this ever happened.
"Cosmo, you're writing about me?"I also have a succubus, named Jezebel. That was her speaking. I don't know if it's Jezebel from the bible, but she claims to be. She calls me 'cosmo.' I think she is a Saurian. We did some stichomancy and other forms of divination together. I'll just open a book to a page sometimes and you'll be surprised at how fitting that sometimes is. She places a black dot over things she wants me to look at or read, or she uses the black dot and then writes something. I have to take care I am not so dark that I do not destroy myself. I worry and fret...
