Trusting Him

In Him Alone

Faith.

(n.) complete trust or confidence in someone or something; strong belief in God or a doctrine of religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof

It keeps us steady in troubles.

It fails.

It helps us in our relationships.

It doubts.

It grows.

But, more importantly,

It is our rock in everything.

Faith is what we build upon,

What we lean on,

When all else fails.

Some wavers and falls apart,

For they never had it to begin with.

But others stay strong and believe in it.

It helps them keep their eyes on the straight and narrow,

And achieve the prize that will last for eternity.

Faith.

It's a strange thing.

We can either stay strong and firm in it,

Or else all traces of it can disappear quickly.

Faith.

It was never a major role in my life.

I pushed the thought away.

I didn't need faith.

I was fine with being myself.

I didn't need anyone guiding my life,

And I didn't want to believe in what I thought was nonsense.

I claimed life was fine but was never true to myself.

A year ago today, my life was so much different.

Time goes faster than you think.

Troubles had hit hard,

And I tried to give up so many times,

Yet, for some reason it always failed.

Why, some may wonder.

Now, looking back on it I know why.

I know why all of it happened.

Why the endless days of me sitting in the corner with tears streaming down my face as I abused myself in harmful way happened.

Why the endless nights of me laying in bed feeling alone and cold happened.

Why the pain that tore my family apart happened.

Why the self-depression I caused my self every moment happened.

Why the voices in my head chanted horrible lies happened.

Why the thoughts that overtook my being worse than imaginable happened.

I know why this happened,

Because it all gave me faith in the end.

A faith that will not be shaken for eternity.

My life is dependent upon it,

Which is dependent upon my Rock that holds me firm in life's toughest storms.

And will never leave nor forsake me,

Because my hope and faith is built on nothing less than Jesus blood and righteousness.