True Colors

Misery

---picture of Jax. He is 16 <3---Crap! D***! Fudge! I was running at lighting speed down the sidewalk trying to get home. Stupid prick teacher made me stay after school for detention! I hope she gets fired. Dad always expected the house to be clean and dinner made when he got home. Unlike most guys, I actually considered myself a decent cook. I ran up the door steps. My hands were trembling as I was rumbling through my book bag. Where is that stupid frickin key?! I dug deep down into my bag and felt a cold piece of metal. Hurry Jax! Put it in the key hole! My hands were shaking, making it difficult to unlock the door. *click* I threw open the door. Hurry! Hurry!!! Dad would be coming any second now. I ran to the kitchen and scrambled to the cabinet. PAN! PAN! PAN!!! I caught hold of the black cold metal and slammed it on the stove. I nervously played with my lip ring. What can I make? I don't have time! I opened the fridge and stuck my head inside. Nothing! There is like no food in here at all! Dam*t! Just then I heard the front door open and shut. I quickly jerked my head and hit the top of the fridge. Crap! I spun around on the heel of my converse. I closed my eyes and bit my lip, hard. Please take it easy on me. I turned the corner to welcome dad home, then I saw it. I knew this would be another miserable night. I swallowed hard examining my father. Crooked tie, unshaven beard, untied shoes. He mumbled something, then took a big swig out of the beer bottle he was holding. He was utterly drunk, barely able to get through the door without stumbling onto the floor.
He looked around the room and then over to the empty kitchen table where his dinner plate was supposed to be. His eyes shifted over to me, not blinking once.
"Dad I'm sorry...I-"
He threw his bottle at the wall, barely missing my head. It splattered and ran in streaks down the wall. Glass now covered the floor like a new carpet. His face was bright red and his checks were puffed out. His breathing was fast and hard. His muddy shoes skitted across the floor as he ran over toward me. I tried backing away but his hands were already on my shirt.
"What did I tell you?! What did I tell you Jax?!" He spit the words through his gritted teeth. His fists cleanched my shirt and he pushed me against the wall. I felt my backbone slam against the hard surface as my fragile body was in the hands of a monster.
"Now your gonna get it! You worthless pieces of crap! You can't do to anything right!!" His nails were digging into my skin, causing  small cuts to form on my arms. His slammed me into the wall again, throwing my head backwards in a fast jerk motion cussing me to hit my head hard. My hand touched the back of my head, already feeling the lump forming. My eyes were burning, I was struggling to hold back the tears. Don't let them show! Don't let him win...he wants you to cry.
I felt a sharp pain on my right cheek. Ow! Ow...that hurts!!! There was a burning sensation spiraling across the side of my face. The tears managed to escape and were now streaming down my face. He slapped me again, this time harder. It stung. I was in so much pain.
"You ungrateful little brat! I told your mom I never wanted kids!!" He screamed in my face. I then felt my body shoved onto a hard surface. He slammed me into the ground and started kicking me. My body lay limb on the wooden floor. I could feel the tip of his shoes hitting my rib cage. Please don't break my ribs!! I yelled inside my head. I crossed my hands over my chest, protecting myself the best I could. He kicked me one last time, missing my chest and hitting my face. My head jerked back from the impact. I felt droplets of blood sliding down my face, along with tears that have managed to escape. My fingers gently touched my nose, where the bleeding was now worse. Blood was getting all over the floor and my hands.
   "Well look what you did now! Don't you blame this on me...you got what was coming to you. Clean this up brat!" He said as he kicked over the kitchen chairs and pushed over our brown round table. He screamed and stumbled off to his room.
   I laid on the floor limb for a few minutes clenching my stomach. I lay on my side staring at the shattered glass. I watched as it glistened in the light. My eyes wondered over the the puddle of redness. Speckles of blood here and there. I can't wait to move out. The first chance I get. My body struggled to pull itself up, as if everything in me had just given up. Maybe I should just give up. Im in a war...but I only prepared for a battle. I pressed my back up against the wall for support and slowly started rising up. Looking down, I noticed my blue t- shirt was torn. It must have ripped when dad put his hands on me. I was lucky that's all he did. Considering what happened last time...I stood up and walked over the grab paper towels to clean up the mess. I took a squat next to the pile of blood. My hand reached for my nose, gently touching it. A surge of anger ran through me. I slammed my fist hard onto the floor. Why?! Why must I be his frickin rag doll! His punching bag! Hi-his son! How- how can he treat his own son like this and not feel a thing? I sat there for a long time...silently weeping. How can he not feel bad? My face was buried in my dirty hands.
   After cleaning up the blood, I went to my room. I sat there on the bed, staring at the wooden floor. I walked over to my slightly cracked mirror. I lifted up my shirt only to see bruises all over my chest and back and a flat empty stomach. I tried to eat when I could but it was never much. My stomach couldn't handle large portions. My hand crossed over my stomach, feeling and passing the scars. Deep scares. I went back over to the bed and dug my face into my pillow. The tears came back, as the flashbacks ran throughout my mind.
  ---FLASHBACK---
   "Mommy! Mommy! Look I can climb the monkey bars!"
   "Good job sweetie! But be careful."
    "Mommy! I'm slipping!"
   "Hold on I'm coming honey!"
"Ahhhh!" *hits ground and starts crying*
   "Honey are you okay? Aww you got a little bruise. Want me to kiss it?"
  *nods head* "mmmhmm"
   *kissed knee*
   "All better?"
   *smiles big and hugs mommy*
   "I love you mommy!"
"I love you too sweetie pie!"
---END OF FLASHBACK---
   I missed her. I missed her so much. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to not cry. Goodnight mom. I then fell softly asleep while the images of mom healed my wounds.
    In the morning, I woke up with a banging headache. My hand reached the back of my head, feeling around until I came across a large bump. Ow! I pull back my hand quickly while biting my bottom lip. God that frickin hurts. I stared at the ceiling fan going around and around. Ehh I'm making myself dizzy. I get out of bed and go down to the kitchen. Time to make Mr. King his breakfast. Phhh. I take out a pan and start making eggs and toast. Shortly after, dad makes his way down to the kitchen and takes a seat at the table.
   "Hurry up I ain't got all day! I got work!" He yells at me.
   Don't worry dad...your slave is getting your plate. I quickly set down his breakfast and get a whiff of it. Man that smells good! I haven't eaten in days. I was so temped to sit down and have some myself but I forget I'm not allowed to sit at the table. I go back into the kitchen and start cleaning up.
   "Where's my newspaper?! Stop fooling around and get me my d*** paper!" He yells with a mouthful of food, spitting some across the kitchen table. I run outside across the gravel driveway, hearing my feet crunch beneath the rocks. Ow! Ow! I had no shoes on. I continued running while the rocks jabbed into the bottom of my pale white feet. I grabbed the newspaper and went back inside
  "Here," I said as I handed him the newspaper. His rough hands snatched the paper. "Finally," he barely manages to get out with his mouth full of food.
   So far I got no complaints about the food. I'm glad he's actually eating. He's probably hungry from not having dinner yesterday. I went back to cleaning the kitchen. Hmmm. Today was Sunday...that means...school tomorrow! Ughh. Even school wasn't safe. My teachers were all a bunch of pricks and the kids were jerks. Stuck up brats.
   Dad finished up his breakfast and was gathering up his things for work. I had just finished cleaning up the kitchen. I watched as he frantically looked at his watch and was hurriedly putting on his shoes. He walked out the room and came back with a suit case. Is this what I think it is?
   He saw me looking curiously at him and he squinted his eyes at me. "I'm going on a business trip out of town for a few days. I be back on Wednesday and when I get back everything better be how it's supposed to. Understand?" He lightly chuckled and gave me a big grin. His yellowish teeth protruding out . "Cause if it's not...your butt is mine Jax."His hands reached down and he gestured toward his belt. I gulped nervously, but my hands were trembling with excitement. I could finally have a small break. In my mind I was screaming Thank you Jesus!

   I watched as he turned and walked out the door, shutting it behind him. I jumped up and punched the air with my fist. Thank you! Thank you! Whoever is his boss thank you for calling him on a business trip! I took a seat on the couch and turned on the tv. It's been so long since I've watched tv...or even sat on the couch. I took advantage of this moment and stretched my body along the couch. I closed my eyes and fell into a deep sleep.