South Park X Reader Oneshots

Craig x Depressed!Reader: Heart of Gold

       Your footsteps echoed through the halls of your empty home as you hummed quietly to yourself. Another day playing nice cop, another day being a sweetheart, another day convincing people that you were the kindest, loveliest person alive. You knew you weren't; you were far from the perfect, angelic being everyone believed you to be, and you hated yourself for it. Your parents were never home to console you, they were too busy going out and getting high to forget they even created you to notice, though you supposed they wouldn't care anyways. They'd blame it on hormones and such, as apparently all teens are suicidal and sad all the time, and it magically disappears once they reach adulthood.

Everyone loved you, except for yourself. You believed yourself to be a disgusting, two faced liar who only acted like a good person to hide their own selfish, revolting personality. You sighed quietly to yourself, figuring it'd be another day of self loathing and pity. You should've been used to this by now, but it hurt that nobody took the time to get to know you well enough to see through your facade. Or so you thought.

You pulled out your device, shuffling through your music and relaxing, trying to calm your nerves as you made yourself a nice cup of tea. Tomorrow would be the same as today, and the next day, and the next, and so on. Your eyes became blurry with tears at that thought. You didn't want things to stay the same forever, but you didn't know how to change them. You couldn't just stop being happy towards everyone. People would worry, and then when they found out what you were really like, they'd turn on you.

~*~*~

You sat in your usual seat at the back of the class, a permanent smile etched into your face. Your so-called friends greeted you warmly, and you returned the gesture, beginning to tune out of their conversation about the hottest new shoes on the market, and instead delving into the more dark corners of your mind. Did they already hate you? You asked yourself these things every day. Perhaps they did. Perhaps they only saw you as an object. A pushover. Perhaps they secretly gossiped about you and spread rumors behind your back.

Then what was all of this for? This fake, plastic plate around your heart painted to look gold? Was this ruse even worth the pain and effort? Did these people even deserve your disguise?

One of them commented on your drained, sagging features, but you only played it off as a lack of sleep the night before. You weren't lying. They accepted it, joking about it before returning to their previous mindless chatter. You felt a pair of eyes watching you from across the room, meeting navy blue irises and a middle finger aimed at your figure. His concern was obvious to you, you had practice in the field of reading other's body language and sensing moods, and you could practically feel the worry dripping onto you as if it were lightly raining down onto your mind.

You waved him off as well, mouthing the same excuse you had used on the girls in front of you. You could tell he didn't buy it, but class started before he could say anything. The onyx haired boy turned to the front of the class, much to your relief. You were too exhausted to be interrogated by Craig today, even if he was your best friend and someone you loved dearly. You just weren't feeling good enough to talk with him without spilling everything today; he always had a habit of pulling things out of you.

~*~

You set your lunch tray down calmly, smiling at the boys in front of you. While most kids in South Park labelled themselves with some sort of group or clique, you generally just wandered around, sitting with whoever would allow it. "Good afternoon, guys. How are you?" You smiled cheerfully, your head reeling. You wanted to know what they really thought as you sat next to Kenny, receiving an equally cheery chorus of 'hello's and 'how are you's.

Cartman was staying unusually quiet, you had noticed. He was staring at you, and for some reason this scared you; you simply smiled sweetly at him as he seemingly examined you.