South Park X Reader Oneshots

Stan x Reader: I'll Always Remember

You stood at the bus stop next to Kenny as usual, though you appeared to be thinking of something, stuck in your own world and staring into space, ignoring the argument between Kyle and Cartman about who was a bigger bitch. That is, unless someone were to follow your line of sight to see that you were stunned at Stan walking hand in hand with Wendy to the stop, standing right beside you. All talking ceased as everyone turned to look at Stan, who was giggling and whispering to his- new, again- girlfriend.

Cartman groaned, throwing his hands up. "Dude, seriously!?" Kyle could only cringe at the sight of them being together yet again, and Kenny was rolling his eyes, a harsh look on his exposed features. You merely cleared your throat and smiled politely at them, sticking your hand out for Wendy to shake. "Hey Wendy, what brings you here?" God you were trying so hard to be nice to this girl, I mean she had broken your best friend's heart every other week since third grade, so it was kind of difficult for you.

You, however, would grin and bear anything if it made your friends happy.

Wendy smiled gleefully and with (fake) enthusiasm, shook your hand. "Oh, Stan wanted to walk with me to take the bus, since we don't see each other enough!" She giggled and looked at Stan doe-eyed. Stan smiled bashfully and nodded. "Yeah, I thought it'd be a good change of pace, since, y'know, Wendy never takes the bus and I only hang out with you guys in the mornings, so I figured you wouldn't mind."

Cartman huffed. "Well, news flash for you two hippie fuckers, we do mind. Go make out with your whore girlfriend somewhere else, where nobody has to look at you gross faces." Stan scoffed. "Just because you're still stuck in third grade and you're afraid of cooties doesn't mean everyone else is, right?" Kyle shrugged, clearly not wanting to upset his super best friend, and Kenny looked ahead, not responding though clearly annoyed. You nodded. "Of course not, just ignore Cartman. You two are really cute together." Okay, you were lying, you hated Wendy with a burning passion and you knew for a fact that the feeling was mutual, but you didn't want to call attention to it because you also knew for a fact that drama was utterly annoying and exhausting.

Cartman said nothing more, but he looked at you as though you had just grown two heads. Kyle looked at you in a concerned manner and Kenny patted your shoulder sympathetically, shaking his head sadly. All three of them knew of your crush on Stan, but you threatened to cut off their balls if they ever told anyone and they knew you would do it. Cartman struggled, but complied anyways after you gave him a few bags of Cheesypoofs and an entire chocolate cake. (That you had to spend you allowance on, but you expected nothing less from Cartman.)

After the bus had rolled up and you had gotten to school relatively safely, you immediately headed to class, skipping any conversation or greetings and sitting at your desk, pulling out your phone to read some fanfiction before class started. As you had predicted though, a flash of purple caught your eye and you were forced to look up from your phone to view Wendy's irritated expression. You blinked slowly, trying to think of what you might had done to upset the admittedly rash and overbearing, but still tolerable, girl in front of you. "Ye-" "Listen here, I don't know what you're planning by trying to act all sweet and innocent around Stan, but you need to stop. Don't think I haven't noticed the looks you give each other and the flirty ass way you talk to him." She cut you off, huffing and glaring at you.

"Flirty- wh, Wendy I'm genuinely just trying to support your relationship, I swear I'm not planning anything, do I look like Cartman to you?" She looked as though she were thinking, hesitantly speaking again. "Well, you do hang out with him a lot, so I guess I just kind of figured..." You gave her a soft, reasoning smile, one that a mother would give her child, and placed a hand gently on hers. "I'm not like that girl, I'm not two faced, I promise. Why would I try to break apart two people who are happy together?" She paused for another moment, before nodding, and smiling at you. "You're right. Let's just... Be friends from now on, okay?" You grinned, and even though you didn't really like her, you supposed you could make an attempt, and nodded. "Friends we are!"