Living to See Our Glory - Modern College AU

Sally's Diner

*tw: disordered eating*

John's POV

We arrived at Sally's Waffle House at around 11 pm. I ordered us both black coffees and started perusing the menu. I decide on an apple fritter pancake. Ahh, reminds me of South Carolina. I look up and see that Alexander had already typing again.

"You seriously brought your laptop?" It was only then that I noticed that the model was so old. I inspected Alex more carefully. His shoes were scuffed and his smart oxford dress shirt was stained. He couldn't be of affluent heritage.

"Why are you staring at me?" His face was a deep red now, but he still was typing away at his 2008 Dell. He paused only to take a sip from his pure black coffee.

"Because I think your very peculiar, Alexander Hamilton." He paused again and looked up at me. We locked eyes for half a second before he looked away.

"P-Peculiar? What's that supposed to mean?" His Cool Guy™ persona was starting to fade away. I didn't know him well enough to ask about his upbringing, but I promised myself that I would learn everything that there was to  known about Alexander.

"It means I want to know you."

"There's nothing to know." His hands started fidgeting and he looked askance. I had an intense desire for him to feel comfortable around me. I wanted him to know that I could be his friend. I stopped admiring him and mixed in eight packets of sugar into my cup. Alexander looked disgusted.

"Why don't you just drink the pure sugar if you're going to put that much? That's gross." I start to laugh and he joins in, too. The waitress comes over and lays our pancake stacks on the table. I glance at Alex's plate. An egg white omelette and a glass of water. I teased him about his appetite.

"That's all you're gonna eat?" I ask with a tinge of humor. He suddenly finds the ground very interesting.

"Uh, I don't have that much money." I stop smiling.  God, I probably hit a nerve. Quick, how to fix this?

"Don't worry, I'll pay for you." His eyes darkened and he gripped the table.

"I'm not a charity case, John." I smile at him and he looks taken aback.

"I'm doing this because you're my friend not because I pity you."

He genuinely smiles for once. You can tell how his brown eyes sparkle in spite of the poor lighting. His eyes crease up and two almost imperceptible dimples appear on either side of his cheeks 

"I'm fine, really. This is all I want." We talked and laughed in that diner for hours on end. It was around 3am when Alex's eyes started to droop. I guess he gained a tolerance to coffee. The earlier dose of caffeine didn't seem to have any effect.

"Are you tired?" He shakes his head quickly, but yawns involuntarily right after. I chuckle and stand up from the booth. I throw away our garbage and Alex steadies himself with my shoulder. We walk back to our dorm and I collapse on my bed. Alex runs to the bathroom and lock himself in. I wonder what he's doing in there. I hear the shower running and I fall asleep to the rhythmic sound. Before I drift away into darkness, my last thought is of Alex.

Alex's POV

I turn on the shower and let the cold water run down on me. God, how could I have been so stupid? I ate so much and I let someone else watch me eat, too. What gave me the right to eat so much? While my friends are starving in Nevis? I kept the shower on and kneeled in front of the toilet. I was scared. It was my first time purging in a long time. I thought I had learned how to eat just enough to get by. I hadn't. I placed two fingers at the back of my throat and pushed. Hard. All of the content from the past day came up. My eyes started watering and I saw floaters. I breathed in deeply, trying to slow down my ragged breathing. The dull pounding in my head reminded me why I pledged that I would never do this again. I would remember this pain next time I tried to eat. I would remember this pain so that I would remember my mother. I washed my hands and swirled some mouthwash in my mouth. I turned off the shower and changed into my pajamas. I looked back at John's sleeping form as I pulled the covers over my body.