Violet Dreams

Chapter 11

Medium-length, really quick update because I was so excited for all the responses last night! Woah! 

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"No. No. No. No. No." I said, ripping myself from his grasp. As I did, I gulped a giant breath of air. I need to get his scent out of my lungs. It felt like my body was trying to separate itself from my soul and it physically hurt my chest.

"Yes, Violet. Can you see now?" He sounded like a mix between ecstatic and angry.

I didn't look at him and instead went right back to packing up my stuff. I could hear him pacing and my mind imagined him running his hands through his hair in frustration.

I wanted to run my hands through his hair.

I almost broke my luggage at the thought. No, now I definitely can't sleep with him because he'll think I believe that we really are mates.

Which I don't.

Because I already have one and having two would be impossible.

Well, sort of.

Pure werewolves are going extinct. There aren't too many left and those turned from a bite don't have the call from the moon as strong – or that's what my parents would say. A geneticist who actually studied werewolves (he claimed it was a "rare species of wolf found in small populations ranging across multiple continents" in his paper) said that having a mate is in our genes.

Since it's in our genes, he said, and there are so little of us, he claims that mates are going to be harder to find or there will be more chances of finding multiple matches. We already knew that sometimes you could find one mate bond was stronger than the other, but that was rare and usually insignificant of a difference (it was also usually in families so you just sort of hoped he/she had a sibling or cousin with a better mate bond!).

Many packs, before I left, were starting to send in DNA for sampling and spending ridiculous amounts of money to find their alphas a mate. Some were having large parties to bring together all the young, unmatched females and males to try and find the best bonds. If one matched, the families would see if there were other matches.

As I grew older, I realized that probably wasn't going to help their genetic diversity, but oh well that's their problem!

I glanced at Carter from the corner of my eyes. His hair actually looked the same, but his eyes were a gold-yellow in the darkness. A shiver ran down my back at the shadowed look he gave me.

How the hell did I not know he was a werewolf? A year. A whole year of working together and I had no idea. Granted, I don't think he had any idea either or we'd have been having this conversation a year ago. He must be as out of touch with his senses as I am.

I shoved some papers in my bag. We were both silent and I figure we're both trying to process this sh*t storm. So, I guess he can be my mate, but here's the thing: I don't want one. Being screwed over by one mate is more than enough for me to deal with.

I want nothing more to do with pack bullsh*t. That includes so-called "mates" – a term I firmly believe means less in the 21st century than it did in even in the 20th.

"Violet." His voice sound almost broken and I stopped mid-step. "Are you going to reject me?"

Rejections are a little more common now that people find they have multiple mates – though usually they happen almost simultaneously (I.E. you find two mates and reject one who probably also found his/her other mate at the same time) since these parties were so large. To many it's like cutting a small string. If you only have one mate, some say it's more like cutting a chunk of your soul.

Probably because it involves actually cutting up a chunk of your body, but I don't like to think about that. I could never understand why some took it so lightly when I'm well versed in the fact that you can ignore your mate for over 10 years and be perfectly fine.

"I-," I couldn't finish my thought as he was on me, pulling at my hips to meet his body. His arms wrapped around my back and neck and I felt his lips touch mine.

His smell overpowered my senses and his skin felt like fire under my fingers. I understand now why he always felt so warm and I wonder if he felt the same about me all this time.

His mouth demanded more and seemed to try to find its own answers in mine. I met him with just as much power, but he bit my lower lip and grabbed at my hips roughly. I gave in. This is his battle.

His mouth trailed kisses down my neck and his hands explored my body.

"I can help you." I barely heard his words. My own desire was spinning through my head. It felt as if fog was covering all of my senses and I had to fight to hear him.

He seemed to understand and continued.

"Him." His mouth met my collar bone. "I can make you forget. I can help you." I wanted to tense up and pull away again, but he held me tighter to him. I know I can leave if I really tried, but part of me wanted to know – Can he do what I've been trying to for 10 years? Will he succeed? Is it even worth the second chance or am I just dreaming?

The thought lingered in my mind that, maybe after all these lonely years, I've grown bitter. Maybe I should accept my werewolf side. Maybe I should just try....

My arms tentatively went up to wrap around his neck. He growled against my lips and pulled me flush against his body. A moan escaped my lips that I initially wanted to take back, but thought better of it as I felt him smile – actually smile – against them.

I wish I had seen it, but feeling his soft lips against mine....well, I'm not going to complain.

It felt like forever as we stood there, exploring each other's mouths slowly, before we finally parted. My face was flush and I felt hot all over, but he looked as calm as ever.

His grey eyes stared into mine. "Violet," it was almost a whisper, "I was serious. I can help."

"Why would she need your help when she can just have the real thing?" If I could take a snap shot of this moment, it would be scatted pieces in my hands. My body froze – from my toes to my nose – and I felt the blood rush to my head.

Him.

He's here.

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Please let me know if the whole mates thing doesn't make sense. I wanted to change it up slightly from the norm and thought this would be fun. I've studied a lot of genetics and wanted to make something up rather than just let it be "Fate" (not that there's anything wrong with that!)