The Little Mockingjay

Home: Finn's POV!

Song: Home by Dotan

Believe me, I've carried around half conscious girls covered in vomit before, but never like this. Nadia's head bobs up and down as I step, her brown hair swaying back and forth. Her lips are cracked and her mouth is slightly ajar. I can see the outline of her ribs through her shirt. Pink-tinted skin graphs peek out from her collar around her neck.

Her cheeks are pale from the cold and tear stained. I still think she looks beautiful. Battered and beaten? Yes. In need of a repair? Yep. Broken? Probably. But I've discovered that often times, the broken things are the most beautiful, it's just that no one bothers to put them back together and see their true form. I know I haven't told her, but I really do love her. I've loved her for longer than she knows. We grew up together, and I've had a crush on her since we were kids. Sure, I've been with a lot of girls, but I was always afraid to be with Nadia. I didn't want to do that to her; hook up but never commit, cheat, leave her and move on without thinking twice... I don't know why I'm like that. Maybe it's because I never seemed to run out of options. Maybe it's because I'm afraid of being left first. I'm afraid of being abandoned. My dad abandoned me. So did my mom. I know it's a terrible thought, I know neither of them chose to leave me, but it feels like abandonment. It was only when I realized that our days were numbered that I finally told Nadia about my feelings for her. Now they're stronger than I thought possible, and she's all I have left. I've never been in love before. I am in love with her, but I couldn't tell her. Maybe I'm still afraid. Maybe I just couldn't say that word because my heart was too broken. How can you talk about love when you've got a broken heart? My heart breaks a little more every time I think about Mom, but Nadia pieces it back together. My mom and I were best friends. Sure, everyone called her mad, but she was more than the troubled women with a nightmarish past. I love- loved her more than life itself. And now she's gone, too. She's with my dad, but I'm here all alone. As we approach the hovercraft, I silently thank Mother Nature for the downpour; it hides the fact that I've been crying, even though I swore to myself I wouldn't do that anymore. I carry Nadia onto the vessel to find that everyone is already on board.

"What happened!?" Peeta says as he rushes over to me.

"She went home. Had a little bit of a breakdown, I think. I'm sure she'll be okay. Just over tired."

"My poor baby," Katniss cries into her hands.

Peeta desperately tries to comfort her, although he looks pretty shaken himself. Gale stares off into space, like he doesn't quite know how to react to what he's seen. Johanna sits next to him, looking pretty bored, but they're holding hands and she's tracing light circles on the back of his palm with her thumb. I sit down and place Nadia on the seat next to me, resting her head in my lap. Flint is next to us.

"Ew," he says, looking at the vomit, half of which has been washed off by rain.

"We've all had a long day," I tell him, flashing a smile.

He looks me in the eyes (when did he get so tall?) and asks.

"How are you, Finn?"

"Been better. But I'll be okay."

We lapse into silence for the rest of the flight. When we land back in 7, Flint says,

"I wish we didn't have to stay here."

"We have nowhere else to go, buddy," says Peeta gently.

I don't think twice before extending an invitation.

"Stay with me. Four wasn't hit too bad, right? My house should be okay."

Katniss and Peeta exchange a knowing look. They're doing this as much for me as they are for themselves.