Disney and Me

Rivers of "Meh"

Rivers of Light just debuted at Animal Kingdom in the Walt Disney World resort. This show has been notoriously late, which is unusual for Disney. The only thing I can think of that has taken longer is Rocket Rods coming back from that refurb. (That's right, still holding out hope for that Spring 2001 opening!) Unsurprisingly, This show is highly anticipated, and along with Pandora represents Animal Kingdom cementing its place as the better Eisner park at DAK,.

You've read the title. Don't misinterpret that as me saying RoL is bad. It's a great show. But for a 10 month delay, it had better have been Fantasmic/World of Color amazing. It's not. It's like World of Color met IllumiNations. Animal Kingdom can't have fireworks. Period. That meant they had to make a highly impressive visual spectacle. It just looks small. The fountains are nice, but they did it better with World of Color. The floats are nice, but Fantasmic did them better. The water projections aren't impressive whatsoever. Fantasmic and World of Color did them better. The ritualistic feel was done better by IllumiNations.

The feel of the show is very IllumiNations-y. It's an ancient animal summoning ritual of some sort. There's some conflict somehow, but poorly defined. I think it probably outdoes IllumiNations theatrically, because that's all they could focus on. The floats and lotuses don't do much to advance the show, though. They're just kind of there. It's like the entire show is the dream segment of Fantasmic. The entire show does not advance its own plot. IllumiNations makes its lack of plot obvious. Rivers of Light tried to have a plot and failed.

I will say that it would not work at any other park. It does give a uniquely Animal Kingdom vibe. The floats present a kind of architecture that would be out of place at Magic Kingdom or Hollywood Studios. Epcot might be able to make the lotuses work, but it would be very, very difficult. The show's projections tie into the Animal Kingdom unofficial motto of "The Intrinsic Value of Nature." It feels like they made it specifically for Animal Kingdom. I can't say that about Fantasmic or the Magic Kingdom fireworks shows.

The show is good. It will have a nice run of 10 years or so. It will never reach the popularity of Fantasmic or World of Color. It's easily adaptable, like World of Color, to whatever promotional junk Disney wants to throw in there eventually. Where it lacks is feeling Disney. Animal Kingdom as a whole has this problem, which contributes to Rivers of Light's big ailment. The only Animal Kingdom things that really feel Disney are Festival of the Lion King, It's Tough to be a Bug, Finding Nemo - The Musical, Expedition Everest, and DINOSAUR. Chester and Hester is just a carnival. Pandora is not a Disney property. The Oasis is a zoo. Kali River Rapids is really cold-hearted for Disney. Kilimanjaro Safaris is a safari tour. Harambe, Anandapur, and Serka Zong are Disney for the sake of having theme. It's the problem California Adventure ran into at Disneyland in Anaheim. There, Paradise Pier was not Disney when it opened, Pacific Wharf isn't Disney, Hollywood Land isn't Disney, and Grizzly Peak has been Disney-fied enough.

Don't get me wrong. Animal Kingdom is a wonderful park. I love when Disney does things well without utilizing one of their intellectual properties. That's why Animal Kingdom is better than Hollywood Studios. They've made it good without using many intellectual properties. Rivers of Light is good. Disney just hasn't figured out how to make a good show without their intellectual properties. IllumiNations wasn't the greatest either. If your Disney show reminds me of IllumiNations, it could've been better, but was still pretty good. That's where Rivers of Light is.