When the Clock Struck Midnight

When the Clock Struck Midnight-13

Chapter 13

          The week after our…disagreement was most likely the worst of my life. Jordan had made sure we didn’t see each other at all. Every morning he would wait moodily in his car for me to come so he could drive us to school. Once he’d park in front of the school, he’d get out, slam his door, and walk away without looking back. The fact that he actually bothered to take me to school reassured me that we weren’t completely ruined. There could still be a chance, no matter how slim that could be. It showed me that even though he was angry at me, he still cared about me.

          It wasn’t enough though. He avoided me in the hallways. He avoided me during lunch, making sure that he didn’t sit anywhere near me or in my peripheral vision. He ignored me in class. He acted like we were never best friends. It hurt a lot to feel rejected and it made me realize that this might be how he felt.

          I thought he needed time and space to think over what happened. Maybe, he figured out that he was wrong, I thought. My chest started to hurt again. Did I want him to be wrong?

          Of course, you idiot! Why would you doubt yourself?

          “Because I’m an idiot,” I offered aloud. Unbelievable, I was arguing with myself again!

          The worst part was that he and his mom were coming over for dinner tonight. While my parents made small talk after they’d arrived, Jordan and I sat awkwardly side by side. He couldn’t ignore me now that was for sure. His mom was sitting across from us, conversing with my parents, who sat on either end.

          “Sweetheart,” my oblivious mother said to me. “Could you pass the gravy?” I searched for the gravy only to find it sitting next to Jordan, which meant I’d have to either reach over him to get it or ask him for it. He must’ve read my mind, because he automatically reached for the gravy and handed it to me. His fingers accidentally brushed against mine, giving us temporary physical contact. I kept my eyes down, afraid that if I looked up, I’d find him glaring at me. After giving my mother the gravy, I made sure my eyes didn’t stray away from my plate for the rest of the meal. The constant awareness of a tense Jordan sitting next to me was starting to get on my nerves.

          After dinner, I rushed for the bathroom. I took my time making sure I’d washed every part of my hands at least twice. Don’t want those germs on my hands now, do I? It was pathetic, I know. I was hiding from him in my bathroom and I wasn’t afraid to admit it.

          I opened my door to find Jordan’s mom and my parents standing at the door. Jordan was nowhere to seen, so I assumed he was outside, waiting on his mom. A feeling of disappointment and sadness settled at the pit of my stomach.

          Suddenly, an arm was around my waist and before I realized what happened, I was pulled by that arm into the kitchen and twisted around all in less than five seconds. He was standing in front of me, his arm reluctantly pulling away, but that didn’t help. He was still incredibly close. It helped me notice where we really were. A kitchen. What was it with us and kitchens?

          “We need to talk,” he said. It was the first thing he’d said to me all week and he says, ‘we need to talk?!’ I glared at him.

          “The last time you said that, you got pissed at me,” I accused.

“I know.” I paused. I truly wasn’t expecting that.

“What?”

          “Holly, I’m sorry, okay? I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I made a mistake. I’d much rather have you as a friend than nothing at all. I was just being stubborn, okay? I’m sorry. I just—I just don’t want this to screw up what we have. And I really, really miss you,” he finished.

          “Umm….” Um? Is that all you could come up with? “Ok.” Nice. That was such an improvement.

          Shut up! Get out of my head!

          I can’t, idiot. I am your head. I could hear my inner voice cackling at me. God, I really was crazy.

          “Ok?”

          “Ok as in, ok, I will…take you back?” I grimaced. Oh God, did I seriously just say that? Since when was it so hard to tell him how I feel?! Fortunately, Jordan smiled in amusement and gratitude, yet there was something else hidden underneath it all.

          “Ok.”

          “Jordan, let’s go!”

          “Bye,” he said, walking around me.

          “Bye,” I whispered, knowing he was already gone.

          Can someone tell me what just happened?!

          What, you weren’t there? I distinctly remember you being there. How else would I know that you were there? I could almost imagine my conscience smirking. I shook my head at my insanity.

          He said he wanted to be friends again. Wasn’t that what I’d wanted all along? So, why do I feel like this? Why do I wish he would’ve said something else? Why do I feel like a part of me was still missing? As I’d looked up at his face, I could tell he’d completely regretted telling me he wanted to be more. For some reason, that fact hurt a lot more than it should have. I sighed and went upstairs. Getting into my bed, I prayed to God my relationship would go back to normal.

          The next morning, I woke up and lay in my bed thinking back to last night. I finally felt happy. We were friends again and no one was angry at anyone. I was finally able to open my French doors without worrying about being ignored, which is exactly what I did. Open my French doors, I mean.

          I brushed my teeth, washed my face, had my breakfast, watched my favorite TV show, went on YouTube, checked my Facebook, and it was only 11:38 in the morning. I’m one of those early birds. I spun in my spinning chair, completely and utterly bored out of my mind. Just then, something caught my eye. It was a stack of CDs on my dresser. I got an idea. I checked to see if Jordan was up, just in case he saw me. I popped a random CD in my CD player and pressed Play. I turned up the stereo to High. The song that started playing was My Life Would Suck Without You by Kelly Clarkson. I got caught up in the beat and since no one was watching, I felt the urge to dance around my room. I picked up my hairbrush and sang along.

'Cause we belong together now, yeah

Forever united here somehow, yeah

You got a piece of me

And honestly,

My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

          I spun in a circle and smiled. I felt foolish and silly, but at that moment, I couldn’t care less. I sang until the second chorus. That was when I turned and faced my balcony, hairbrush in hand, to see none other than Jordan. He was standing in a dark grey sweatshirt and jeans. He was also watching me with a mix of a smirk and a genuine smile on his face. I was sure by now my face was beet red. I walked out onto my balcony. I shivered at the sudden cold.

          “What are you doing?” His smile grew to an obnoxious all out smirk. If he wasn’t so far away, I would’ve knocked it off his face permanently with my brush.

          “Watching you,” he said, unembarrassed of the fact he got caught.

          “Right. Well, can you stop?” He pretended to be in deep thought and I rolled my eyes.

          “No.” He grinned at and I couldn’t help but crack a smile, too. It seemed to me that everything was back to normal, just like I’d hoped. If only it would actually last.