their love

Saying Goodbye

This morning was going great. Dawn turns 2 in a few days, so I need to start planing her birthday party. Everything was going great until I got a call... It was from my mom. My dad died, I broke down. I called mike and told him I needed him to come home. Mike came home and I cried for a while, me and him packed up stuff that would last us about a week, and started our drive back to Oklahoma.
"I guess she's going to have her second birthday in oklahoma."
"I guess so, don't worry though we'll make sure she loves it."
Dawn was asleep it took us approximately two days to get there. Once we were there I meet up with my mom.
"Hey mom"
"Hey sweetie"
We sat down and talked for a while, about she was doing and how the family was. Mom laid down she said she was really tired, so I decided to take dawn to meet one of my favorite nieces Kiya.I haven't seen here since I moved out, and it would be nice to visit them all. Mike went out and got us a hotel for the next couple days, then went out and made sure we had food for dawn. Me and dawn finally got to Tracy's. I knocked on the door.
"Hey! Felicia I haven't seen you in forever!"
"I know, I was around so I decided to come visit."
"The kids are not here, but they will be back soon"
Me and Tracy caught up and she played with dawn too, then there was a sudden knock on the door.
"That must be them!"
She answered the door*
Kiya- "hey momma"
Tracy-"hey, I've got a surprise for you."
Before she could tell Kiya dawn ran out of the room and hugged her aunt Tracy's leg.
Kiya-"mom who's that?"
Tracy-"its your aunt Felicia's daughter!"
Kiya-"you mean she's here!!!"
I walked out of the room and she hugged me tight. By now she's a good amount taller than me. I decided to take her out to dinner. To spend some time with her. Tracy gladly offered to watch dawn. I called mike to let him know I was going to the movies with my niece.
After the movie**
I took Kiya home, picked up dawn and went to the hotel. I tried to sleep but Couldn't because my dad was On my mind. I knew this was going to happen but I refuse to except the fact that it has happened. I sat there all night and if I wasn't crying I was just staring into space. Mike woke up about 3am and held me close to him hoping that would help me fall asleep but it didn't, he fell back asleep. The funeral was tomorrow and I knew I was not ready for it.
The next day*
I shower, put on my black dress, and do my makeup. I keep my self from crying. I wake mike so he can as well get ready, I'm not taking dawn. I don't exactly want her around something like this at such a young age. Mom calls us letting us know my sister Tina is not going so she could watch dawn for me.
"Hey puddin?"
"Yes, beautiful"
"I miss him."
"I know angel, but he's not in pain anymore. Now he's in a place where he doesn't have to worry about being hurt."
"Thanks baby, you've always been good at cheering me up"
He kissed my forehead and got into the shower. I knew today was going to be a long day.... Once Me and Mike were ready we took dawn and some food to my sisters house, then headed to the funeral home. Once we got there my new job was to hold myself together. We sat through the service and a few years fell, but the hardest part waited for me, saying goodbye. I strongly believe that goodbyes are forever, so when talking to someone I don't say goodbye I would say "see you soon" or something along those lines, so saying goodbye to my dad is going to be hard. Sometimes you really don't have any other choice though.
The time was here, I slowly walked up and once I saw his face my strength was gone. I placed a book on his chest, the book was my diary a book full of secrets that he now protects. I whimpered "goodbye" and walked away crying badly. Mike took my hand once I sat back down and pulled me close to him, he hummed to me. After the service was over i went home and literally cried myself to sleep. For the next few weeks I knew my life was going to be hard.