letters // h.s

letter number four

4. his hair

hello harry,

i am sorry

but i don't know why.

you see, i left you for almost three weeks without explanation but how could i write to you when i was stuck in the hospital with everyone looking at every single damn moment because i couldn't handle it anymore?

i just hate myself so much for my mistakes

i hate just hate myself for leaving my friends

i just hate myself for breaking my mother's heart and destroying my own family without noticing

i just hate myself for being so damn selfish and oblivious of what's actually happening.

i don't know what to do,

like, i'm scared of facing my family and them asking why,

i can't tell them, i can't tell them that i'm like this because my best friend decided to-

no, forget it, i shouldn't tell you, after all you aren't reading any of this.

sometimes, i want to break that rule and see if you are actually reading, if you care.

but how would you care when you don't know me?

and, if i break that rule, that would be awkward to know that you read this.

whatever, i should stop talking about it.

you know, i actually love your hair.

i don't know, maybe is because is your curly locks (well, what's left of curly locks)

it makes me want to like, put my little hand over your hair, and play with it, or see if it's soft (it just looks so damn soft like i wouldn't feel these curls around my fingers)

and then, i remember how weird your hair would be, i don't know if you do something or whatever, because sometimes it was just so curly that I would say "how in the damn hell can he brush his hair?"

and sometimes it would look so straight that i say "damnit, where the fuck went your curly locks, fucking get them back"

whenever I ask someone "what's the first thing you noticed about harry?" and they would say "his curls!"

i'm not gunna say i noticed something else, because I would be lying, in fact I actually noticed your hair and the way you shake it and run your hands over it.

I remember when you were just sixteen and oh my god, your hair was curly as hell, I remember laughing when I saw you fighting with it because it would cover your eyes or ears.

and now,  you still have it but now you try to put it back and lemme tell ya, it looks so damn hot.

you'd better not laugh at this shit, i'm not gonna let your ego go high (if you have one, who knows)

anyways, i also remember an interview you did with niall from i don't freaking know and the guy or sir (whatever) asked:

"how does it looks if you put your hair on the other side?"

and you just shaked your head and run your hands over your hair to the other side and told him:

"you tell me"

and i swear, i never laughed so hard.

i hope the girl that you love plays with your hair because if she doesn't then I

i don't know what the hell is going on.

and i hope, that she at least annoys you with the curly locks while kissing you.

lots of looooooove,

your sad sky.

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fuck

i hope you like it,

im grounded

and i am sorry for not updating im trying

and damnit i did this on my phone sorry if there are mistakes

ill dedicate this to zenmilk because i want to (i love everyone)

love ya

flora.