Denial ✘ Stamon ✘ Defan

Part 9

The boarding house came into view and the car screeched to a halt. Stefan looked over to Damon to see him still delirious. Deciding it was for the best, he got out of the car and hauled a weak Damon into his arms. 'You should have stopped me before I went this far.' Stefan mumbled and although Damon could hear, he had too little energy to reply.

Stefan bashed open the door with his shoulder, they hadn't locked it- they rarely did- and carried Damon inside before flinging him onto the sofa like throwing trash onto a heap. Stefan was too tired himself to have any grace. He followed by throwing himself on the sofa, bringing his brother's head onto his lap.

'Damon?' He asked, a question to test whether he was awake or not. 'Damon.' He stated again, shaking his shoulders gently. Damon turned his head and groaned, his face now turned away from Stefan. 'We need to talk, Damon!' Stefan complained, bringing Damon's face to his.

'You always want to talk, brother.' Damon groaned groggily.

'I know, talking is a good way to know what someone else is thinking.' Stefan looked down at his brother, moving the loose locks of hair from his face.

'I know. But, brother, we haven't been ourselves lately- everything's changes. We've changed, our situation has changed and I don't- I don't know what to say anymore.' Damon breathed, closing his eyes gently, shutting out the world around him. Stefan nodded in agreement, even though Damon couldn't see him.

'We've started new lives hundreds of times. What would be so bad about starting again now?' Stefan asked, waiting for Damon to open his eyes. He didn't, instead, he spoke with his eyes shut and just pretended that this was someone else he was talking to- someone else that wouldn't make him have to start over.

'I don't want to have to start again, Stefan. But, I don't want to keep this a secret either.' Damon was fed up, just as Stefan was. They both were thinking the exact same. Stefan didn't care, though. He leant down and pressed his lips to Damon's.

'It's too late to turn back now. I don't want to and I won't.' Stefan mumbled against his lips before pulling away and resuming his old position. Damon, though, his eyes now open, had other ideas and roughly tugged Stefan's collar bringing him back down to his level and attaching their lips in another kiss.

'We still need to talk about Elena.' Stefan pulled away, breathing heavily. Damon groaned and leant his head back so the tip of his hair brushed against the sofa.

'No we don't, Stefan.' Damon growled, trying to scare his brother away- another defence mechanism that never seemed to work.

'Yes, we do.' His voice was emotionless and Damon could tell that he was trying to break Damon out of his shell as he always did when Stefan lacked emotion. Stefan's time as a ripper had meant the balance had to change. Stefan had become evil, cruel whilst Damon became sincerer, kinder.

The two brothers were weighing scales that were always balanced and when one hit rock bottom, unfortunately, the other had to hit their high. They could never both be happy, it seemed that was impossible. They could feel content, balancing in the middle, but true elation wasn't possible because that could only happen if the other hit chronic depression and when one of them was like that, the other would never be happy.

'No, Stefan.' Damon warned, urging his brother away but as usual, it didn't work.

'I want you two to split up. I'm going to admit that I hate seeing you together. This may be...this...but that doesn't mean I want you cheating on her.' Stefan explained, fiddling with Damon's raven hair. Damon nodded in agreement. It was true, he had kissed Stefan whilst still being in a relationship with Elena. He had been cruel to her and only now did he realise it.

Damon's face fell and Stefan could notice the sudden change in atmosphere. 'It's fine, Damon. Everything's going wrong and we are just living life as it goes along, we won't tell her- she won't know about us.' Damon nodded. Neither wanted to tell anyone about their relationship. The two boys were used to living in the shadows and if the shadows were the only thing that could accept their relationship, they were fine with that.

'I'm going to break up with her. I tried before but I was too nervous.' Damon looked timid and avoided Stefan's gaze.

'My brother nervous? I think you have the wrong person.' Stefan chuckled quietly as Damon let his lips quirk up into an awkward smile. 'Thank you.' Stefan whispered and brought Damon into a sitting position so Damon could rest his head on his shoulder and Stefan could rest his head upon his. 'I want you to do one more thing, though.' Stefan said, gazing at the wall, lost in thought. Damon looked up at him, quirking an eyebrow.

'What?'

'Bite me.' Stefan stated as if it was obvious. Damon recoiled, all contact lost.

'Are you crazy?!' Damon shouted.

'I bit you and I want to return the favour. This isn't me owing you anything. I just...I just want to try it.' Stefan's sentence trailed off and Damon understood. His little brother was curious.

'Never been bitten before?' Damon teased. Stefan shot him a glare, the nerves still clear on his face. 'Fine.' Damon breathed, inching closer to Stefan until they were in the same position as before. Damon brought Stefan's wrist to his mouth and let his fangs extend. 'Are you sure?' Stefan nodded and without hesitation, Damon ripped through Stefan's flesh.

It was bliss, for both of them, Stefan had never felt this way before except drinking out of others and he felt as if this was a healthier alternative. Although getting your blood drained wasn't exactly good for your health- he was a vampire, none of that mattered anymore.

Damon stopped much earlier than Stefan leaving him giddy rather than faint. Their gazes met and they both smiled widely, both looking nervous to speak but happy that it had happened. 'This is so weird.' Stefan breathed, shaking his head.

'That actually happened.' Damon laughed quietly. Soon enough, they were both laughing, filling the silence with some much-needed joy. It seemed that in the last few hours they had been happier than they had been in a while.

Joy doesn't last long, though and they knew that a secret couldn't be held forever. It would just be a matter of when theirs came out.

word count: 1086

published: 5.03.17