Bully (scomiche)

Depressed

I got out of my bed and put different clothes on, some deodorant, cologne, and brushed my teeth.

I put on my favorite boots and was out the door.

As I was walking I went to maps on my phone and put in Scott's address.

Thirty minute walk from here. Ugh.

I began my journey and made it there in twenty five minutes. I chose to run half the way sense I'm getting out of shape again.

I walked up to his door raising my hand to knock. A big rush of anxiety flew of me and I didn't have the courage to even knock.

I heard a group of kids talking obnoxiously loud. As I realized who they were I immediately knocked on Scott's door.

"Hey." He opened the door wearing emoji slippers, black sweat pants, and a shirt that says 'bored 24/7.'

"Hi. Can I come in?" I said nervously.

Scott turned his head and saw my friends walking this way. He motioned his hand for me to come in and closed the door.

"So......" we stood there awkwardly.

"Is there anything you're here for specifically?" I shook my head no.

"Okay....." we had a moment of silence.

"I-I've been emotional lately....Today I went to the mall with my friends and because they were hungry, we went to the food court. I only had two dollars so I bought myself a small ice coffee, and Travis immediately said he wouldn't share any of his meal before I said anything to him. I don't know why but I just broke down and left...." my eyes filled with tears again. What's wrong with me?

"Aw." I quickly wiped a tears away before it fell.

"I just can't seem to control my feelings." His eyes shot open.

"What?" I snapped at him.

"You're depressed? Don't tell me you are because I'm making you good?" Now my eyes shot open.

"No! And I'm not depressed!" Another tear, then another, and another fell.

"This is so embarrassing." I laughed nervously as I wiped away another tear.

"Mitch....."

"What?" I looked at the floor.

"Are you sure that, the things at home aren't causing depression? I know what it feels like to be depressed, I've been there." He pulled up his sleeve and showed a few scars.

I gasped lightly. Did I cause these scars?

I broke down again. This time I could barely even breath. He rushed over to me as my knees hit the ground. I was full out sobbing.

He rubbed my back softly. "Shh. Mitch, please stop crying." I heard a small cry come from his voice. I was sobbing so hard I caused someone else to cry. My sadness brought tears to his eyes.

"Shh." He kept rubbing my back, but I just couldn't stop crying.

"Everything is h-horrible."

"What do you mean Mitch?"

"My p-parents don't c-care about me, and all my friends are h-hoes and only care to hang out with me because they don't want to become bullied. Why can't I just be l-loved?" I hid my face in my hands.

"I'm sure your parents love you Mit-"

"No they don't! Last night my parents b-beat me up because I argued with them about not having enough food for my little sister. She kept crying and hid behind me which pissed my parents off even more because she chose to take my side." I showed him a huge bruise on the side of my stomach.

"Oh my god! Mitch this isn't right!"

"You think I don't know that?!"

He rubbed the bruise. I flinched back at his touch.

"Maybe I am depressed. Maybe that's why I wanted to slice up my arms last night." I said like it was nothing important.

"Mitch..."

"I don't even deserve to live Scott. All I do is tell people in school how horrible or ugly they are, and how much they DONT mean anything in this world, and I-I-I, I act just like my parents....." I froze.

"I beat kids up and tell them how worthless they are. Just like my parents...." I started to cry again. Not as hard this time.

"No Mitch you-"

"Stop. I'm just following my horrible parents foot steps. I've been bullying all these kids, I now realize how it feels to be treated that way..."

"I'm really really sorry Scott. I've been re worst to you." I cried.

"It's okay. You went through a lot. You've been through a lot. It's not like your parents were super amazing and gave you everything you want. You don't have such a great l-"

"I'm sorry. I just can't." I stood up.

"Where are you going."

"Home."

"Okay."

"Never mind. I don't know where I'm going." I sat on his couch.

He came over and sat down next to me. I avoided all eye contact with him. He kept on coming closer until our bodies touched. He put an arm on my thigh. I looked up at him.

"Scott."

"Hmm?"

"Can I cuddle with you? I really need someone to cuddle right now."