rum - joshler/tysh

i

AM I MORE THAN YOU BARGAINED FOR?

five years later

THERE  WAS something wrong with josh. he was sick; his head pounded, his eyelashes stuck together, his throat was dry. but that was it, no sniffles, no cuddles. josh was distant. josh wasn't josh, per say. he still went to work, he still whored himself out to nasty men and women looking for a good time, he still kissed tyler every day.

but one day, he stopped all together. tyler got a call from josh's workplace, wentz, way, and weekes (which, suprisingly, was a music store and not an expensive law firm), saying that he was absent from work.

"heyo, ty-guy," pete, the manager, said over the phone. "is josh at home? he's not at work."

tyler, curious about where josh was, peaked into the bedroom to see the latter in bed, curled up against the wall. he spoke into the phone hurriedly, wanting to get to josh as soon as he could.

"yeah," he spoke. "but he's not feeling well. got to go, bye!" he hung up, not wanting to hear what the manager had to say. he made his way to josh, kneeling on the bed and causing the boy to let his eyes flutter open. there was no smile, no quick kiss, nothing. it intrigued tyler as he leaned down and kissed josh's face. he flinched away with a whimper.

"josh?" tyler asked softly, reaching out to touch the boy but immediately recoiling. "are you okay? did something happen?"

tyler's question only caused josh to pull his sleeves over his hands. "joshua dun," tyler said forcefully. "let me see your hands."

of course, on his wrists there were normal, way faded scars. but what was the blood on his hands.

"i...i don't understand," tyler pondered. "did you have a nosebleed? did you hurt yourself and not bother to tell me? what?"

although his voice was soft, the intensity caused josh to flinch back.

"i'm so sorry," he mumbled, tears threatening to fall.

"sorry for what?" tyler questioned, moving closer to his love and putting an arm on his shoulder.

"i'm sorry for--for all of this," josh whimpered, falling into tyler's touch. "if i hadn't've killed andy and joe this wouldn't've happened. we'd be fine, a little beaten up, but fine. we could've had a family with a nice, white picket fence and i could be singing 'somewhere thats green' while you're mowing the lawn. but no," he looked up at tyler sorrowfully. "i just had to do it again."

"joshie, honey," tyler bit his lip. "you killed again?"

"yeah," he nodded solemnly. "more than once."

--

sorry for such short chapters.... i will get longer ones done in the future.

song: sugar we're going down - fall out boy