Secrets and lies (Waterloo road )

6

I got home in the early hours of the morning. I had been away for a week I needed to clear my head I know that everyone had been looking for me, after I was told I was brought up by a stranger I had hit self destruct and honestly I couldn't give a damn about it right now, all my life has been a lie I never knew I had one sister, never mind two sisters and were triplets. I thought that the man that I grew up with  was my father and it was all a lie. My life was a lie and I didn't know how to cope so I had gone back to my old ways the drugs abuse. I knew I had messed up big time, it took me so much hard work to get myself off of the drugs and I was back to square one. Maybe after everything, I deserved what he did to me, maybe he was right I am a failure, unlovable nothing but a disappointment even after sixteen tears my own mother still doesn't want me. No one loves me anyways, why should they im a mess and complete and utter mess. I threw my bag to the floor and knelt down checking the stage I had bought, the cocaine and heroin where still in my bag. I sighed a breathe of relief I needed to find a safe place for them before someone found them, but first sleep.

I lay on my bed hugging my pillow to my chest crying about just how messed up my life, when the door opened and in walked kenadee. I didnt sit up ,didnt move, didn't acknowledge her.  I just starred at the wall by the door as she stood at the bottom of my bed "where the hell have you been N, you've been gone  for over a week everyones been worried about you" she said and i sighed "places...with people" i said as i starred at the wall in front of me "are you high? if you are you want to sober up before mum finds out" kenadee said and I laughed bitterly "mum? huh she barely earns that title" i said "yes....well you've been gone a week and avoiding the subject pf poppy" "what about her, the fact that the great super head Rachel mason had triplets, doesn't know who the father is and kept the oldest though didn't really as she got send to boarding school, the she send the middle triplet to live with who she thought was her father, and turns out he was a stranger and then there's the youngest who she dumped in care" I said "is this what its about mum" she asked me and I frowned "im not calling her that until she acts like one" I said sitting up to face her "poppy doesn't deserve this hate you have towards mum though, she's a nice girl and our sister" kenadee said and I ran my hands through my hands "im not....im not hating on poppy, ken, im hating on mum" I said as she sat on the end of my bed knocking my bag over. I jumped off the bed trying to get it but she had got it first "give me my bag ken" I said "no, what have you got in her" she said "i said give me my bag damn it kenadee" I said as I went to jump on her fighting it from her but she stood up and walked across the room with it "i swear to god, if you don't give me my bag...im gonna" "your what? what are you going to do" she asked me as I knelt on my bed and I sighed

There was a knock at the door and poppy walked in I smiled at her "so your the third one to us, the third musketeer" I asked "i guess so, where have you been all week" she asked me and I sighed "i need space" I said "what is in this bag that you don't want me to see" kenadee said and I rolled my eyes "nothing, its my bag....I just want my bag" I said as she tipped up the contends of my bag and out came my stach of cocaine and heroin "i thought as much....I knew you were high but I never thought you were on this type of drugs I thought you had just smoked something, damn it neve" kenadee said as she paced the room "neve, this is dangerous stuff, you could kill yourself" poppy said and I rolled my eyes "i don't care, I don't care anymore" I said as kenadee sat on the end of my bed "you need to sober up neve, cocaine, heroin isn't good for you it messes with you, jeez god since when did I become the responsible one" kenadee said "since your the oldest, look N, she's right this is destroying you and if mum finds out she's..." poppy said "mum can suck my non existent dick for all i care, she'll probably get a thrill off it, the ex hooker she is" I said "if your not going to help yourself then I, going to have to tell tom" "hmm good maybe he can come round for a quickie, do you think mum would find if we do it in her bed" I said and kenadee stood up and shuck her head "wow.....you really have messed yourself up, what im going to do is for the best for you" kenadee said as she grabbed the drugs off of my bed "what are you doing" I asked as she walked into the bathroom and dumped it down the toilet flushing it away "what did you do" I said as I yelled at her "im saving your life, and if you don't sober up im going to tell tom, heck ill even tell mum" kenadee said as I started at her "whats the point, I don't feel anything I just feel numb, a waste of space" I said and kenadee looked at me "your not, your our sister and we love you" "and we're going to help you through this" poppy said "what if I don't want help" I asked "tough, were triplets and we stick together" kenadee said and I sighed how was I suppose to tell them that it was the only thing getting me through the day, and I was a bigger addict then they knew.