Steal His Girl

27

   I decided not to go school the following day. I didn't even remotely get up on time. I slept in all throughout the morning till noon. School is usually at 7:45.

I really did need the rest.

   I felt somewhat better but the thought of my body half exposed to my peers made me feel so violated and uncomfortable.

   I still didn't want to know what my messages read but it was about time I got it over with. I opened my phone, tapping in the passcode. I went into snapchat waiting for the messages to pop up.

   Scrolling down the list so many people commented. Mostly guys along with a few girls including my friends.

  The first person was a freshman. His name was Eli.

   He was pretty annoying, and obnoxious. Screaming up and down the halls. He was pretty popular but had an immature personality and no surprise, he dated that equally annoying girl Jill. Can't wait for what he says.

   Hopefully my sarcasm is evident.

  I pressed on the message and read it. "Woahh.. I'd tap that😏."

EW! Oh my freaking gosh noooo!

The smirk emoji?!?!  No! He can stop right there with his pervy emojis. I think I'm going to throw up.

   I didn't bother to reply and exited out. Next message. This one was from a senior in high school named Dallas. I didn't really know him but he was pretty attractive.

   He'd try to occasionally try and start conversations and flirt with me but I wasn't really interested considering I'm not exactly single. Plus he's older so..

   "Hit me up.. your so hot!!"

  Ew that's disgusting! I never knew how disgusting guys could be after reading these snapchats. And the fact that they screen shotted them is even worse!

   That picture will never go away. Not even after it gets deleted from Tasha's freaking story.

    I dreaded opening each and every one of those messages. For the most part it was just perverted guys that wanted more pictures. It made me feel so nauseous.

   I hated this filthy feeling I had in my gut. It was terrible. I almost started to cry again, but somehow I managed to keep it in.

  "Ashley omg! Tasha had no right!"  Ava messaged me.

   I ranted about her to all four of my friends who had sent me a message. If I hated Tasha before, can't even describe the hatred I felt for her now.

    I'd so much like to kick her iron board behind to the curb. That freaking paper clip looking skank needs to get a grip because she can't go around picking fights just for fun.

  I did nothing to her. Absolutely nothing. I tried ignoring her, I tried to control my anger I really did. I did try to stay away from Andrew but he came to me. He bought me the gift and hugged me.

   I know he had no idea, and I don't mean to point fingers but it's his fault. I know how it sounds. He's been so sweet to me lately and I'm here blaming him. But it's his fault. It's always been his fault. Everything that has happened to me was because of him.

My boyfriend and I fight.. because of him.

I'm losing interest in my own boyfriend.. because of him.

My underwear pictures were leaked to everyone in my school.. because of him.

I ended up in the hospital..

BECAUSE.

OF.

HIM!!

  Do you see what I mean? Over these past few months I've gotten to know Andrew and spend time with him. He's a completely different person once you get to know him.

   But.. he's just not good for me. Colleen was right, I need to stay away from him. I can't keep letting bad things happen because of him.

   As much as it hurts to say, I think it's about time I ended our friendship. I can't keep doing this.

   Something always ends up happening because of something he does. I've never admitted this out loud before but.. he's the reason I'm losing interest in Josh.

   I don't know if I like him or not but when we're together, even if we're just talking, I feel an excitement that I can't describe. I can't help but smile, and my heart races when he smiles.

   With Josh I've never felt that. Yes I'd be attracted to him, but there was never an exhilarating feeling between us. I know I say that I love him but.. I don't even know what that means.

   Love.

I'm starting to realize that the attraction I've been feeling towards Josh wasn't love. It's just well.. attraction. We don't love each other. Maybe we really like each other but I'm just not into it anymore.

   Everything was fine until Andrew showed up that first day and I've been lying to myself this whole time. Telling myself I love Josh when I don't. I don't actually love him.

   I don't know what I feel.

Josh probably likes me way more than I like him but I can't hurt him like that. I just can't.

   I want to try and get more involved with my relationship again. I don't want to break up.

   I like what we had going. It was safe and steady. I can't have that with Andrew in the picture.

   Something needs to change.