Drugs
And addiction comes when we're struggling
When hope never finds a pity bone in me
Boned me
And I just see all the pretty things
Vanish into ghosts clinging
Onto ghost string and ghosts
Never gonna find a host in me
Cause I told my dad Ima make him proud
And never say "just kidding" cause just
Because I'm a kid doesn't mean I'm kidding
Just because I'm small meant I ain't gonna be big
Just because I don't know nothing
Ain't mean I can't be the smartest in the room
Got friends all over the corners and tattered
Curtains mom never bought cause
The sun lights you up when nothing can
Life can't put a hole in me
Not a hole in my dreams, yeah not in me
Call the devil find another buddy in hell
Cause I found God in a family
But the family got torn up, messed up
Because of me
Maybe that ain't reality, but that's how I see it that's how I see things
And
Snap
I'm bleeding
Time ain't ever gonna find mercy for me
Happy blood flowing over kitchen sinks
Cause I can't feel the pain
No
I can't feel nothing no more
All I got is pain to remind me I'm still alive
Still living still breathing still struggling
Cause life's a bitch and you can't tame it
Give me a whip and Ima try
Cause that's what they all say,
You don't know till you try
I got a rhyme and I put it in my poetry
Cause that's the best whip I've ever seen
Yeah, that'll teach him
That'll teach all the man women animals things that ever wrong me
Stoned me shamed me accused me
Left me to die
Yeah
But I know it ain't no ones fault but my own
Cause this is my life and no one's but my own
But tell a man bleeding in the desert
With no one but he on his own
Yeah no man in robes no Samaritan
No God to help no devil in hell
Just a man alone
He gonna die
Cause his hopes been taken
By robbers just trying to get by
And 16 years of my life
And I've learnt evil is good
Good is evil
ImMoral? Nah just amoral
I think there ain't no good and evil
Just laughs and cries
In a life of cause and effect
And that makes me wanna point a gun to my head and pull it just like that
Blood spill on the wall and
Ima find myself in oblivion
Can't think can't feel can't be
Cause Ima be nothing
Not metaphoric, not a speck of dust on a black screen
Just nothing
But I can't die just yet
Nah I ain't afraid
They say suicide is selfish
Leave your loved ones in anguish
But I ain't got options
The only one's self-elimination
But hey, depression's really just tunnel vision
So let's not move too quick
But I ain't diagnosed I ain't sick
Cause watch their eyes if I admit
I'm just some sick patient some sick pig
Someone to cure, put down
Cause im always down
But spare me that mercy killing
Is it ego, tell me bruh, what's inside you killing?
I don't know.
But hell, I gotta stop writing
See these words all say something
Ima end it off cause times ticking
And life's calling
I think I've lost myself
And my life's -
YOU ARE READING
Ode
PoetryHere's an ode to the night he/she left; here's an ode to the anxiety you feel on a sunny morning and everything was supposed to be fine; here's an ode to the feelings left unexpressed; here's an ode to the words left unsaid, or perhaps what can...
