Bruised Innocence

Chapter 14

*Trigger warning: Intense themes ahead, self harm*

I just stood there paralyzed with fear and disbelief.

Please God, just let this be a dream. I prayed.

I just stood there staring at him pleadingly to leave me. He seemed content to just stand there looking at me with those eyes that made me want to flinch.

Footsteps sounded behind us and soon Gloise was standing next to Samon.

"Oh! You found him," said Gloise seeming surprised. I couldn't help but think that he felt a bit dejected.

Samon turned sharply to look at him and I flinched, covering my face with my hands at his sudden movement with a whimper.

"But you found him first! Didn't you?" He demanded and looked at Gloise in a disapproving manner that appeared positively dangerous to me.

I looked at Gloise. He did look a bit contrite at the remark but he didn't look afraid, just wary.

"I can't believe you would do this to me!" Samon hissed, one if his hand effortlessly came to rest next to my shoulder on the tree behind us, effectively trapping me between them.

For an onlooker, it might look like a couple of students talking things out in the corridor. I bit back a whimper after my eyes landed on his watch.

The school! It had started. My test!!

I looked desperately at Gloise. He straightened up at that, all pretense of being submissive to Samon disappeared.

"Come on Samon, Leave the kid alone. Just look at him," he gestured towards me from head to toe.

"He is bruised all over and God knows how he survived the night in these woods. Besides, you have already had what you wanted." Gloise finished the last sentence in a lower voice, averting his eyes.

Samon's lips just curled on one side in response. I felt all hope within me fizzle out in one instant.

I would never make it to the school. I would never be able to sit for the test. Who was I kidding? He would never let me go. No one could help me!

I stepped back and my foot landed on something firm which almost slipped me by rolling out from under my feet.

I looked down, it was a broken branch. It was shaped like a stick, pointed like a spear on one end. I instinctively picked it up from the ground and brandished it at him like a sword.

It made a swooshing sound and Samon dodged back. Even Gloise looked a bit alarmed. He raised his hands up in surrender.

"Please don't come any near to me or or I will--"

"Or you will what? Hit me with that twig?" Samon leered at me.

I sniffed and he started laughing.

"Look at you! You can't even hold your hands steady. " He mocked.

I realized I was shaking with fear and he was smirking.

"Arwin, listen--" Gloise tried to speak but for some reason, it made me snap.

"NO!" I screamed and he flinched.

"What did I ever do to you?" I cried out, "I have never hurt you or anyone at the school! Why? Why can't you guys just accept me?" I shrieked at him.

"Because I was born poor? Is that it? I just wanted to study and--" tears trickled down my face.

The pointed edge of the stick almost poked Gloise in the eye and I quickly lowered it in horror, "I am so sorry, I didn't mean to--"

Two hands gripped my chest from behind me and I gasped. I had almost forgotten about Samon during my rant to Gloise, allowing him to sneak behind me and lock me in his arms.

"I---Exam---my parents," I sobbed, "Please just let me go!"

"So, you could run to the police and narc on us?" Samon said in a voice in my ear that made me shiver.

"I just want to go to school, I swear I won't tell anyone." I started crying.

He scoffed and that did it. I sneaked a look at his watch again.

The test had started. I will never be able to earn that scholarship! I would never be able to attend the school again.

Matt wouldn't be around me anymore. He will soon forget about me. I would only be a burden on my parents.

It would be better for everyone if I just--Maybe it really was time to end it.

I gripped the stick with both of my hands while Samon struggled to hold my around my shoulders.

Gloise just looked at me in alarm. There was both warning and dread in his eyes but he didn't approach me.

I don't know what kept him away, the sheer grief, the despondency or my will, but he just stood rooted a few paces away from me.

Finally, I managed to raise the stick and stab myself with it.

Red blinded my eyes and I felt the world spin. My feet gave away. Pain threatened to engulf me.

Both of them gasped and Lacey ran towards me barking. Samon leapt away from me in shock. Gloise started coming towards me but Lacey came barking at him, chasing him away.

I found myself lying on the ground. My vision came and then blackened in turns. The world had tilted to a side.

I could see the sky sneaking in from the forest canopy. The morning rays, a bit too bright. Samon's concerned face appeared too in my vision before it blackened once again.

I was clutching my stomach with one hand. The part where the stick pierced burnt and I just wanted it to stop.

I regretted it and cursed myself for not thinking about the pain. This was worse.

It will be over soon. I tried to console myself but it didn't help. It wasn't ending soon enough. My hands felt warm. I couldn't bear to bring my hands up to see them.

It was too much pain and my vision started to blur. I fell on the ground and the last thing I heard was Lacey barking at me.

*Woah! It just feels so much more intense now. I can't imagine how I wrote this intense stuff 6-7 years ago. So much angst, phew! Updated on 23/08/20*