The Children of When (Complete)

Chapter 37: A Matter of Trust

Eager to escape the stench of the pool, and the sight of the spider lying shrivelled against the wall in the cavern, they headed back down the last tunnel towards the waterfall. They had been walking for close to an hour when they heard the distant rumble of the waterfall.

Leah had been watching Belle, and from the way she kept closing her eyes, and wincing, every few steps, Leah guessed her head still ached from the scream she'd sent into the spider's mind.

"How about we stop and have a rest for a minute?" She knew she'd been right, by the look of gratitude Belle sent in her direction. "I seem to remember the sound of the waterfall getting absolutely deafening just up ahead."

They slumped to the ground gratefully. "Okay, how about we pool what's left of the food and water."

Leah pulled out an apple and a sandwich, remembering she had emptied her water bottle in the vault. Belle added two apples, two sandwiches and some cheese. She'd hardly eaten anything all day! She just shrugged, and mumbled something about eating, and stress, and nausea. She also had some of her water bottle left, which she added to the pile.

Raff hadn't even attempted to open his backpack, which meant he had nothing left. He sat looking at the ground, obviously expecting them to have a go at him.

Leah smiled at the small pile of food. "Cool. We have a virtual feast, a sandwich and an apple each, and some water to finish off. Pity there isn't a hot bath around. Then I'd be perfectly content."

She chuckled when she saw the grin return to Raff's face. She threw him an apple and a sandwich, then watched as he devoured them. They sat in silence for a while, each lost in their own thoughts.

She looked at her two friends, and marvelled at what they'd all achieved together since arriving in Florisia.

She thought back to her last week in Naissance. She had been so angry about having to leave her childhood home. Her cheeks grew hot from the memory of how self-absorbed and caught up in her own personal pity-party she'd been. She picked up her backpack and put it on the ground behind her, stretching out on her back and using it as a pillow.

She couldn't stop thinking about how Belle had sent the scream into the spider's mind, long enough to distract it for Raff to shape his weapon. She suddenly realised that throughout all the horrors they had faced, she was the only one who hadn't risked her own safety to save the others. The only times she had used her Gift were when she knew it wouldn't harm her.

The truth hit her like a bucket of cold water to the face. She was a coward! Why hadn't she tried to use her wings and flown at the spider to distract it? Why hadn't she used the water in the pool against the slimy creature? The truth was, she had thought about it, but she'd been too scared to try. Poor Raff had almost drowned, trying to get her to use her Gift at the waterfall.

Well, no more! If Belle and Raff can be brave, so can I. She just needed to learn to trust her Gift, and her friends. Maybe the reason her Gift didn't work unless someone was threatened, was because she could only use it when she was desperate? She really needed to talk to someone about it.

Maybe if she tried to explain how she felt to Raff and Belle, they could help her deal with it? She'd never been good at sharing her problems, preferring to work them out on her own. Before she could change her mind, she sat up, and looked sheepishly at her friends.

"Ummm guys, I need to ask you about something...?" She trailed off, the words stuck in her throat, as they both turned to look at her.

"It's just... Oh, don't worry about it." She looked away, tears burning behind her eyelids.

Belle looked at her, concern in her eyes. "Hey, what's up?" She shuffled closer, and put her arm around Leah's shoulder. It was the sympathy that brought her undone. She told them about everything she'd been thinking, her face growing hot with shame as she admitted to thinking of helping and then not doing anything. Raff and Belle didn't say anything as she talked; letting her purge herself of the self-loathing she was feeling.

"Wow, Leah, I think you're being way too hard on yourself. You've done so many awesome things too; you need to stop beating yourself up for what you haven't done! Hey, we're only kids remember? We're supposed to make mistakes, and do the wrong thing sometimes, that's what kids do!"

Raff's eyes were sad as they looked into hers. "Yeah, she's right you know. I used to be totally desperate to go on adventures, thinking it would be cool to be a hero and stuff. Well, it's not! I have spent more time terrified in the last week, than I have in my whole life. And after today, I'd be happy never to go on another adventure as long as I live!"

Belle squeezed her shoulder. "I think maybe you just need to trust your Gift a bit more. I know that every time I use mine, I feel a little bit more confident about doing it."

Raff chuckled. "Yep, me too. It sort-of grows on you."

Leah sniffed, and wiped her face with her sleeve. "Okay, I get what you're saying. I am scared every time I reach for my Gift. I'm worried it won't work, or it'll kill me, or I'll make a mistake and do something wrong. To be honest, the whole thing just freaks me out."

"You know what? I think it's perfectly normal for us to feel weird about the whole 'using our Gift' thing. That's what the Fey Academy is all about. They're supposed to help us learn to use them. I'm sure we're not expected to know how to use them in life or death situations quite yet!" Belle grinned, and Leah smiled back.

"So, I reckon we should just head back to the waterfall, and see what happens. I can always just step out under it again if you need me to!" Raff winked at her, and she punched his arm.

"Ow! You must be feeling better. Let's go." He jumped up, and offered them a hand each.

"Thanks for listening guys. I'm sorry I'm such a pain."

Belle smiled. "You're not a pain. Besides, that's what friends are for."

Leah took a deep breath as they headed off towards the waterfall, the churning in her stomach getting worse with every step. She gritted her teeth and kept walking, determined not to fail this time.

The roar of the waterfall was just as deafening as Leah remembered it. Trying to ignore her shaking legs, she stood in front of the curtain of water and reached down to where she knew her Gift lay. For the first time, she embraced it fully, feeling it surge through her, allowing it to consume her. She released the power flooding through her into the waterfall in front of her, and watched in awe as it parted instantly, the water in the lake sweeping apart into the same walls as it had done before.

Wow, that was so cool! Her entire body was tingling from the sensation of her Gift surging through it. She smiled as Belle and Raff stepped up on either side of her and squeezed her arms.

"Awesome. Now let's get out of here!" Raff yelled to be heard over the waterfall, and they stepped out of the cave into the clean, fresh air of the Forever Forest.

Leah could see Dominic and Dub sitting with the elves they had left waiting. She raised her hand to wave, as Dub's voice slammed into her mind for the first time.

"It's a trap! Tyranius is here! Run!"