Closure ~Asking Alexandria Love Story ~

Chapter Three - To The Stage

I slowly walked back to the room I woke up in-still no idea where I was. I'm guessing this was a spare room juding by it's emptiness.

I threw myself onto the bed and just laid there for a while, thinking.

Leaving Lindi would be great-no really it would be, I don't like her, she doesn't like me, it's a win win. She will still get her money for 'looking after' me even if I'm not there. However, going away with James and the rest of Asking Alexandria? I don't know.

We still need to fix up a lot of things, I myself must fix up a lot of things to do with my life, what I am-who I am?

I'm broken, and the last thing those guys need is a miserable girl around them while they party. Not gonna lie, I do get happy-some times..

I heard a knock on the door. I flipped over and buried my head into the pillows. The door creaked open, I heard footsteps, then felt a presence beside me on the bed. I looked up, half my face still burrowed into the plump pillow. It was Ben.

"I think you should come with us to be honest" he whispered, he pushed himself down the bed so he was lying next to me, we were both lying on our side by this point, staring into each others eyes. It was quite intimidating for me, being a huge fan of Asking Alexandria and being face to face with my role model, not talking about band stuff or how much of a huge fan I am, but talking about reality, the realness of it all.

"Why do you think that?" I whispered back. Pushing my arm under the pillow.

He looked down, then back up at me. "Because maybe, just maybe it could make you happy, and judging by the response you gave me as to why you hurt yourself so bad, maybe this could be your moment. Spending it with us cunts" he smiled. 

I closed my eyes. His scent was mesmorising, almost putting me in a trance-like I wanted to just hide in his arms for the rest of my life. 

"How?" I mumbled. 

"Shane, James needs you, I don't think he rememered that feeling for a long time-like say if I got rid of my guitars right?" he sat up and began talking and moving his hands in the postiton of a guitar almost as if he was imagining what he was saying to me. 

"Say I got rid of one of my guitars cos I was bored with it-and I get a new one, and its okay, it's awesome, fret feels great, smells good-you know that sorta thing-but it doesn't fully satisfy me? It's shit when it comes to holding it and I can't play with it because it's harder to tune- then I see my old guitar-and I realise I want that guitar back, so I get it back, and I realise, I fucked up" he turned to me and smiled. "You get it?" he chuckled.

Somehow, I did. I understood what he meant, and it was great how he put it into words. But I just still felt like shit. 

"I get it but-"

"But nothing, Shane, come on, I promise we'll look after you and I promise we will help you through this!" he held my hand. Squeezing it every time he said promise.

I bowed my head, I sat up and brought my knees to my chest and nodded. "Okay"

His face lit up, I don't really know why. He has known me for such a short time, all he knows is that I self harm and that I'm a mess-and look a mess for that fact.

What was happening? This couldn't be real. One minute I'm at my "home"  the next I'm passed out on a rock and then when things just get seriously fucked up, I'm in a random apartment with a band I've been in love with since I could remember-a band my friend from the past so happened to be in. It was like god was playing a trick on me, bringing back memories and hoping I fall for whats happening.