Ibinu

Chapter 1: Fresh start.

Jss1.

As my 8-year-old self looked up at the gate of Triple C High, fondly called the "purple chasm" by its students, she wondered for the first time in her life if she was adopted. 

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I had to look back at my dad to make sure we were both seeing the same thing and that it wasn't just a mirage, then back at the gate and then back at my dad.

After looking back and forth continually for about a minute, I discovered that the usual communication by look wasn't working, though I couldn't for the life of me understand why. 

It always worked when adults did it. Is it age-restricted?

"Daddy, you're going to drop me here? I questioned, "If I don't make it back alive, it's on you." He ignored me, TYPICAL.

After a period of extensive thinking, I decided to go with the next best thing, mental messages.

ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋꜱ ʟɪᴋᴇ ɪᴛ ᴅᴏᴇꜱɴ'ᴛ ᴇᴠᴇɴ ꜱᴘɪᴛ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏɴᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴋɪᴅꜱ ɪᴛ ᴅᴇᴠᴏᴜʀꜱ.

 This has to be a new level of snubbing. Oh, my poor withered heart! These children of nowadays won ti baje.*

ᴛʜᴇʏ ɴᴏ ʙᴏʀɴ ᴍᴇ ᴡᴇʟʟ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴀʏ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇꜱᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ɪ'ᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴛʜɪɴᴋɪɴɢ, ᴏᴜᴛ ʟᴏᴜᴅ ꜱʜᴀ.

"Lola, why are you looking constipated, are you ok?", asked my mum.

ᴏꜰ ᴄᴏᴜʀꜱᴇ, ɪ'ᴍ ɴᴏᴛ ᴏᴋ. ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴇᴇ ɪ'ᴍ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴇɴᴅ ᴍᴇꜱꜱᴀɢᴇꜱ ʜᴇʀᴇ?

"Yeah." I mumbled.

"Are you sure, do you want to go back home?" She questioned further.

As I was about to say yes, I got a glimpse of my dad's bad eye, that clearly said: "It's not hafter driving for over 5 hours we will now go back because of constipashion." 

ɪ ꜱᴡᴇᴀʀ ɪ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʜᴇᴀʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀᴄᴄᴇɴᴛ.

"No." I whimpered, it seems the bad eye is the only parent-child network today. So not fair.

I looked back when I heard the gate open and saw the school official who was meant to take us on the tour of the school. OH FUN.

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Ahhhh, I am so frustrated from listening to him talk on and on about how great the school curriculum is, how many awards the school has won,

how respected the school is, how so and so recommended the school on live television that I almost asked him why they were still looking for students if the school was so great.

Luckily the resounding knock I would get from my dad and my home training stopped me just in time.

So instead of listening to that dry* man, let me give you my guide on the types of students that exist in secondary school, I call it "L's tricks to survive boarding school" :

Specimen A: "The princes and princesses"- They can usually be found saying eww to basically everything in school. They don't know how to lay a bed or even fluff their pillows and feel it is beneath them to even polish their shoes.

Specimen B: "The forming gang" - They like to act like they are Dangote's sons and daughters, you can usually spot them boasting to someone about how Hannah Montana was invited to their birthdays, how their private jet is packed beside their swimming pool in their backyard.

And how their cosmetics were specially ordered from Paris, cause and I quote "Common goods hurt their expensive and delicate skin" while they proceed to use mentholated dusting powder as talc powder.

They often claim they can't speak their native language while forming British accent with their native accent coming through.

"The FFO'S (For food only) - those who are on close terms with the kitchen staff. They are only your best friend during breakfast, lunch, dinner, your birthday, visiting days and any food-related occasion.

"The Obanjes*, Seers and Innocents" - who claim they're witches, can communicate with spirits, can transform into animals, lie about seeing forces dragging someone's soul and fake speaking in tongues to seem more spiritual, and really believe that if they shake hands with a boy, they can get pregnant. 

ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴊᴏᴋᴇ.

"The popping kids" - who every senior loves because they have one talent or the other, know the latest songs and can deliver hot gist for Africa. This group also contains those whose eyes don tear.

"The romantics" - who can swear on their Bibles or Quran that they have found the love of their lives, will be together forever and marry so-and-so, while still in Jss1 and of course they can give all their money and provisions to that significant other.

"The norms" - those who fit in with normal secondary school life and are just basically surviving while being sent on errands throughout their junior years.

"The loaded ones" - whose parents are actually rich and are usually low-key. You can know them by how casual they are towards madly expensive things and how school staff always seem to suck up to them. 

And of course, there are those who can't quite nicely be put in a box, "The others" - who pretend to be like everyone else and try to fit in, some might be liked for their intelligence, accent.

Their sense of humour, long hair or white teeth, while others may be disliked for something as simple as the way they look, walk, talk, dress or even their weight.

ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘ ɪꜱ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢ.

It would have been so much better if I knew this earlier cause then I'd have been prepared for orientation and basically secondary school in general, but oh well, what's life without a few mishaps.

Oh, and one more thing, if you're one of the others, the weirdos, the outcasts. Better find a strong backing and fast, trust me you're going to need it.

Lola out.

Glossary
-Won ti baje: They are spoiled.
-Obanjes: Witches/Wizards.
-Dry: Boring