Remember

Relief

It was the only way. It was my only escape. I didn't deserve such an easy relief but I couldn't stop myself. I deserved to spend the rest of my life in a prison cell, being fed horrible foods and being forced to do hard and labouring activities. Instead I cut it short. That was the moment my heart and mind agreed. We need relief. We need an escape. We need it to end. You, we need to die. So that's what I did I grabbed my sword with my shaking hand and lifted the blade.

I shut my eyes and focused on the guilt and fear and depression. I had nothing left to live for. I would never be able to start again. So with that, I brought the blade down upon my chest and felt it pierce my skin. I felt the cold metal cut through me and the blood come out. It felt relieving to know that I would be gone soon, then the pain shot through me as it pierced my heart.

That's how I got here today. Standing in this room. I know now what comes after death for the wicked and I deserve what I got. I am sat here telling this story to you today to show the world, and the judges, that I deserve every last punishment I get for my actions. If I cannot be punished whilst I am still connect to my body, I shall be punished without my body. I shall live in an eternal hell. With a knife in my heart and guilt on my chest, I will suffer. It is only fair. You are a good spirit. My soul told me and I know it's true but my actions can be the only judge of my punishment. I am damned to watch those moments again every night until forever. I am damned to be put through undying pain. I am cursed and that's okay.