Fourth Doctor One-Shots

Inquiries and Insults of a Different Kind

"Doctor, are you sure you know how to do this?" he mocked as he twisted the multi directional cog tightener, "Look at that!" he grunted in frustration, "Is this another silly Earth tradition?" the Doctor was quite annoyed with Romana's constant nagging questions and need for attention. "But does she ever realize what I do to keep her out of danger? NOOOO! Because Romana knows best." the Doctor slid out from under the TARDIS console and continued his venting at K-9, "Let ME fly the TARDIS, Doctor! I do it better anyway! Let ME make contact with natives! I'm more knowledgeable of their ancient cultural customs than you are! I graduated with a Triple First! Let ME examine the dead body! I'm faster when it comes to calculating decomposition!" The Doctor huffed and puffed, he simply couldn't stand how she insulted him at every chance she got. He sighed, "At least I can rely on a certain mechanical canine not to wander off or attempt to out-Doctor the Doctor, eh?"

"Mas-ter, Mis-tress is correct in her assertion that she is superior in flying the TARDIS,"

"Do shut up K-9! I wasn't asking for your opinion,"

"I can not have an opinion, Mas-ter, I am only a machine."

"Oh Doctor!" Romana rang out from the corridors as she neared the TARDIS console room, "I have a little surprise!"

The Doctor rolled his eyes, the clicking of Romana's heels on the floor already began to echo in his ears. He propped himself up against K-9's metal casing and started muttering, "Why do I bother to keep either of you around..."

Romana strode into the console room holding something behind her back. She noticed his position on the floor almost immediately and addressed him, "Doctor, what are you doing on the floor?"

"Contemplating regeneration." The Doctor shot up to face Romana with a somewhat bitter expression. "Don't you have something better to do than to pester me with questions and insults?"

Romana's benevolent smile turned on itself to reveal a confused frown. "What do you mean?"

"You take shots at me left and right without giving any consideration as to how it makes me feel let alone how irritating it is having to put up with such arrogance-"

"I was only teasing you-"

"NO, you were doing more than teasing me." 

"I was not. You're just being an over-sensitive time tot-"

"I AM NOT! You constantly pick at my flaws as if you have none of your own!"

She gave a sly smirk and shrugged. "That's because they're non-existent."

The Doctor scoffed, "Far from is more like it! You're vexing, manipulative, rude, unreasonable, and, to top it all off, you're the biggest know-it-all I've ever met!"

The Doctor's words struck Romana surprisingly deep. Was that what he really thought of her? Or was that his anger seeping through his patient grin and unruly curls? She'd had enough of the charades and finally could keep her secret no more. "I only said those things because I like you, idiot!" Romana stomped on the Doctor's foot.

"Ow!" Now it started to make sense. Or at least, that's what he was lead to believe. "Wait! Romana-"

"Here's the present I bought for the fool who apparently doesn't care!" she shouted in an upset tone as she tossed a shapelessly wrapped gift at the Doctor's feet before storming away.

The Doctor crouched down to the exquisitely ribbon tied present and opened it to find a fresh bag of jellybabies. He couldn't help but smile at Romana's kind gesture. The smile soon faded. "Why couldn't she have just told me in the first place..."

(To be continued...maybe...)