The Tune of Love (GaLe)

The final test (part 2)

And so we practiced, and you know, it did really sound good. It only took Gajeel one playthrough to get with my rhythm and after that we synced really well. It was beautiful. It almost sounded like we were made to play together. I got so lost in the moment and in our music that I didn't notice Natsu walk in until the door clicked. I stopped immediately, embarrassed to play in front of him. Gajeel noticed that I'd stopped and turned his attention to me, realising that Natsu had arrived. He quickly placed the guitar back on its stand, also seemingly embarassed to be caught practicing when he had made such a reputation for composing his pieces on the spot.
"Well well well!" Natsu chanted happily.
"You're actually good when you practice! Although, the dedicated student look doesn't suit you..." He laughed. Gajeel reddened just slightly,  but I still noticed. Luckily Natsu didn't or Gajeel would be given an ever harder time than he was having.
"Well, Levy wouldn't stop naggin' and it started gettin' annoying." He said coldly.
"You know how she is, always actin' like she got a stick up her arse. Gotta get the best grades and all that shit." He completely brushed off the fact that he had been the one to arrive early and offer to practice with me! I didn't know how to react. Did he really only do this so I would stop nagging?
"How DARE you!" I started, angry yet also frustrated and confused.
"I'm sorry if I find this more important than you but you didn't have to go to all the trouble of getting here early and pretending to practice if that's all this was to you. I don't care if you get bad grades or whatever! You're on your own!" I ran out with tears welling in my eyes, passing Lucy on my way out the door. She called something but I didn't pay any attention, I didn't want her to see me cry, I didn't want to cry. Why was I crying? Why couldn't I have just shouldered those comments about me, why did I take it so personally? He was obviously just making that excuse to show Natsu he didn't actually want to study, wasn't he? It was just a lie, right? So why? Why had I just started sobbing? Why had I locked myself in a stall in the girls' bathroom?
I guess, maybe, it was because he was almost right? Maybe it was because I know I'm a little uptight. Maybe it was because I didn't want to be. Maybe I wished I could relax as much as he does and be the 'cool friend'. He was right. And maybe I cared that he thought that of me. Maybe I admired him, maybe just a little. Lucy was my cool friend, and my best friend. We had known each other since the start of highschool and we were pretty close. I liked that because she was popular and I got to know lots of people by just being her friend. Everyone that liked Lucy knew me as her academic friend, her plus one. I was liked enough, too shy to say much but enough to be invited with Lucy to parties and such. But by no means was I a cool friend, as much as I would've loved to be. I even tried one year, I focused on speaking up and allowed my grades to slip in everything but music, I tried to be funnier. It didn't work. Anything I said or did was outshined by Lucy. She was born outgoing, it wasn't something you could programme. So yes, I respected and admired Gajeel and his popular and confident demeanour, and yes I cared deeply about what he thought of me.

I dried my tears on the sleeve of my blouse and placed my hand gently on the lock to head back when a gentle knock sounded on the door.
"Shrimp."
I paused, my hand hovered over the lock before removing it. I needed that door, that wall of protection between me and him.
"This is the girls' bathroom, why are you here?" I enquired. He responded with a quick grunt, followed by "it's early in the morning, nobody is here anyway." And then silence. A few very long seconds of silence.
"Open the door," he demanded.
I graced him with no response.
"I'm coming in," he warned, jiggling the lock from the outside. I observed it turning from my side of the door but decided to let him answer. I wanted him to explain himself. I wanted to know he didn't hate me. I needed to hear it. Finally, the lock clicked and he pulled open the door to the stall. I stood where I was, unable to make eye contact, unable to open my mouth to form speech, unable to even put on a strong face as my eyes began to well with tears, once again. It was expected. His face was a strong reminder of what he had said, and the harsh truth that had gone with that.
"I just wanted to say I was sorry," he confessed.
"I was only worrying about my image, I didn't even consider that what I said might've hurt you..." he trailed off.
"I just-" he began, interrupted by the laughter of two girls as they entered the bathrooms, only separated from them by a corner of wall, I panicked. I would not be caught early in the morning in a bathroom stall with a man, let alone Gajeel Redfox! I would be shunned, maybe even expelled! Thinking quickly, I grabbed Gajeel by the arm and pulled him into the stall with me, closing and locking the flimsy door behind him. By the girls' voices I could hear they had come around the corner and was happy with how quick I had thought. It was only now that their laughter had stopped that I realised what had just happened. To prevent being caught in a stall with Gajeel, I had pulled him into a stall with me. We were just inches apart and his scent overpowered my senses. It smelt of a cinnamon cologne, perhaps nutmeg, with Gajeels own smell mixed in. In this proximity I could take in every detail of him. I could see the creases in his shirt from his hurry to get to school and not enough time for ironing. My eyes could linger on his muscular arms, that I had just pulled him by. I could remember how he appeared to me that day I came over. When he stood shirtless in his room. When I was pressed against his bare chest. These are the thoughts that plagued me. Then my eyes caught his and I could see his own thoughts. His eyes were questioning their own intentions and neither of us moved. Neither of us even breathed for fear of being caught.
And then they were gone. The girls had finished their business and left. And we were alone again. Part of me didn't want to move from where I stood, but I knew I had to. Gajeel moved first, hand frantically reaching for the lock, as though scared. He stepped out and looked back to me as we non-verbally expressed our apologies and made up for what had happened.
As we headed back to the music room I began to ponder, and realised that as nice as that felt, I never wanted to be put in that position again. I never wanted the temptation. I never wanted to see Gajeel with that look in his eyes. This was not the path I would take with him. It would never happen again, I'd make sure it wouldn't.