Unnatural Selection | Joshler

Part V

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Things between the two were quickly patched and they were back to where they were, and maybe a little closer. They cuddled more, whether it was watching a movie or right before a show. Josh figured it was Tyler's way of thanking him and that's all Josh could really ask for.  It annoyed Mark and Jenna, but he didn't care. His bones didn't ache when he was with Tyler and he thought about more things other than blood, blood, and blood. Josh felt somewhat normal around Tyler, he felt warm and content and if Tyler radiated with a smile that day, then Josh's day was sunny.

"Josh!" Tyler called. Josh sat up from his bunk, his feet dangling from the side. He sighed out, his bones settling, before the smell of Tyler's blood hit his nose and he fell to the floor, scrambling to the back of the bus. Tyler stood there, blood dripping from his finger, examining it through a sliver of sunlight coming from the window. He greeted Josh with a smile and extended his finger.

"I got a paper cut." Josh stared blankly at Tyler's finger, trying to ease the pain in his spine that cried for the liquid. He had to make sure Tyler trusted him, there was no way Josh could ever drink his blood.

"And?" Josh spoke as controlled as possible. "Do you need a Band-Aid?" Tyler shook his head, Josh's head started to ache as the beast inside him tried to come out. His face was burning hot as it fell into his hands and Tyler watched as Josh struggled.

"I want you to, uh, you can, if you want, drink it? Clean it, I don't know how to phrase it but-"

"What?" Josh's head shot up, eyes red and Tyler stepped back. "Tyler, I'm not drinking your blood," Josh struggled to get out. It felt like every bone in his body was breaking, then reassembling, only to break again. His lungs burned and his stomach bubbled and he needed to get out of there now. He slid down to the floor, his breath picking up. Tyler walked over to him and held out his finger.

"You are struggling, it's okay. I know you won't hurt me." Josh shied away and Tyler sighed. "If you won't do this for yourself, do it for me. I don't want to see you struggle." Josh met Tyler's teary gaze. "I want you to drink my blood," he spoke.

It felt as if the wind was knocked out of Josh. he couldn't do that to Tyler, he couldn't, he really couldn't. But here Josh was, bringing Tyler's finger up to his mouth, the psycho inside licked his lips and told him that he could, he really could. His bones released their lock at the first drop of Tyler's blood on tongue. He was swept away into a wave of emotions, his heart warmed at the glorious feelings, the thankfulness, the gratitude, the satisfaction, the love. Josh's stomach sank. Love?

Josh pulled off of Tyler's finger and looked up to meet his smile.
"You love me?" Tyler's smile faded. Josh had strained his words, making it seem that the word meant more than an 'I-feel-obligated-to-love-you-since-we-grew-up-together' kind of a way. Because it was, he could taste it.  The last sliver of sunlight was swallowed up by the night, the flicker of emerald still imprinted onto his eyes from where the Sun once laid. Josh wanted Tyler's smile to last, glowing forever. No more night, no more darkness. Josh was a sunflower always looking to find Tyler's light.

But Josh couldn't be loved. He told himself he would always give his love to Tyler, because he deserved it more than anyone else. But Josh was a monster, a beast, who knows how long he had left before he became a Level E? He could already feel it, how the resistance became painful, how the urge became more frequent. So Josh pushed himself away from Tyler in that moment, the air around them seeming as if it lacked oxygen.

"You can't love me, Tyler." Josh buried his face in his hands, his palms pressing so hard into his eyes he began to see swirls of green and purple. He created an echo of himself repeating 'you can't you can't you can't' and Tyler stood there, cheeks and eyes burning. "I'm a monster."

"Josh..." Tyler fell in sympathy next to Josh, his throat swelling with a lump. Josh shied away from his touch, as inviting and warm and comforting as it was.

"You don't understand," Josh began, shaking his head along with his shaking body. "I'm losing control." Josh felt like a dying leaf trying to hold onto his tree in the middle of winter. He was alone, the only other people who knew he would become a level E was Mark and Jenna, and she despised him, growling every time they locked eyes.

Tyler stayed silent, as if waiting for Josh to continue explaining himself. Josh sighed as he wiped his watery eyes.

"I'm a level E," he explained. "Or I will be, anyway." Josh could hear Tyler's heart pick up speed, rabbit feet as a beat. His eyes were blown wide open, white, and his body convulsed as if he winced.

"You where human before? Then who turned you?" Josh shook his head again.
"I have no idea." Tyler sighed, wiping away a tear. The both of them turned towards the door as Jenna barged in. Jenna glared at Josh 'get out.' Josh obeyed and Tyler looked at him confused before becoming enveloped in Jenna's grasp. 'What the hell did you do to him?' she asked, but Josh ignored her. Instead he left, stomping off the parked bus, seething in a mixing pot of his own emotions.