Rodrick needs a guitar player for his band, löded diper. What happens when his new guitar player ends up looking like corn anus and a transgender mulan?
At the end of this story, we are going to roast the new rodrick. We hope you like our story, we...
"You're FIRED!" I yelled to the guitarist who I just disintegrated out of löded diper. For the past 3 shitty weeks, the guitary dude has only been playing some classical shit. How do you play classical shit on a guitar? I don't know, but he did.
"You sucked the words out of my anus dude, he sucks. We need a new guitar guy." I said to myself. I was the only person left in the band, the others were too lame to match my god-like emo daddy lord playing skills. I grabbed the guitar with my signature "LÖDED DIPER" logo, and kicked the guy out of my basement. Not my guitar player. Well now we need a new frickin guitar player.
I drove around in my white van, which had "LÖDED DIPER" on the side, totally looking like a pedo. I went EVERYWHERE. I put up signs at the country club, the park, the senior center.
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I was so desperate for a new guitarist that I even put them up at the bathrooms at a really crappy motel. I mean, SERIOUSLY crappy. ½ stars on yelp! Is that even possible to have that much shit coming out of your motel's anus that you get ½ stars on yelp!?
I ran out of gas on the way back home so a cool old guy with a manscaped chest and the same model of white van as me gave me some gas and told me that if i ever needed anything else I could just bring my anus over to his house and have a good time. Too bad he didn't play guitar. 10/10 100% would let him in the band. He was one cool dudeloodle.
I continue to continue my search for a guitarist for days...until I find..................
