I found him. This corn-headed guy was playing his guitar outside of dollar tree and he had a fedora to put money in. An old lady came by and stole his money, but he had like 50 cents so it's okay. He sighed and put his guitar away.
I walked up to him, kicked him in the shin, and demanded him one task.
"JOIN MY BAND YOU ANUS CORN-GREASE HEAD MULAN!"
He looked at me as if I had told him to suck my anus, but all I did was ask for him to be my guitary dude.
"Did you just call me an anus corn-grease head Mulan?" He said with his eyes wide.
"Well what else did you expect? So, get in the van and play your funky tunes little white boy!" He jumped into the shot-gun seat of my bird-crap covered van that looked like a vast, white anus with black tinted windows.
I took him back to my house, and we went into my basement.
"So, show me what you got Edna."
"Edna?"
"You know, the incredibles. If you don't worship such a spectacular movie as hard as I do, then consider yourself incinerated from this band, baby girl!"
He began to play Mary had a little lamb.
"What the actual fuck you little corn ass-"
I heard melodic screeches from little corn farmer man, and he started running around my basement with rage. My little ugly anus brother Greg appeared, and corn man started smashing the guitar against his head.
"GNARLY DUDE" I screamed as I began to throw my entire drum set at Greg.
Greg left, crying like a little baby anus, and I turned to Mulan.
"So, when can you start?"
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Not My Rodrick
FanfictionRodrick needs a guitar player for his band, löded diper. What happens when his new guitar player ends up looking like corn anus and a transgender mulan? At the end of this story, we are going to roast the new rodrick. We hope you like our story, we...