Trials {Editing}

Chapter 30

Harper's POV

"So that's where he was? At your house?"

"Yup," I answered, not taking my eyes off the road. I was spending the day with Willow, Noah's mom. We had just come back from the grocery store and were headed back to her house, where she would be teaching me how to cook on of her signature recipes for lasagna. I wanted to learn how to cook the best I can since I'm almost done with high school. I don't want to use my mother's money through adulthood, so I wanted to learn to look after myself.

Inside the grocery store, Willow had asked me what exactly is going on between me and Noah. So I proceeded to tell her everything; the secrets he kept, the things he did, my breakup with him, ignoring him, and him coming to ask me to give him another chance. She was quite shocked when I told her about all the things he confessed to me that night, and the things I admitted to him. She wasn't hesitant in agreeing that her son deserved my treatment towards him.

"So, are you two still broken up or are you back together now?" Willow asked. "We're back together," I clarified. "But he's still receiving punishment. You can't chase away every man I was interested in for years and get off scot-free."

Willow made a sound of agreement. "What do you plan on doing with him?" she asked. I glanced over at her for a moment, a mischievous grin spreading across my face. "Let's just say that he'll never take me to the circus again when I'm through with him."

Willow threw her head back in laughter as I drove on, simply shaking my head. "Look out!" I heard Willow scream. I slammed on the breaks, heard tires screech against the pavement, a loud boom and a snap before everything turned black.

A stream of tears fell down my cheeks as guilt washes over me. It's my fault. It's all my fault. I should have paid closer attention, I should have seen the car coming... now Willow is dead. And I'm the one to blame.

How am I going to tell Noah?

I sucked in a breath, this hitting me even harder. Oh god, he's going to hate me. After all that we've been through, will it end like this?

Landon came back from saying his goodbyes to his mom. He had tear stains on his cheeks. My heart broke even further, and as a sob escaped my throat, I wrapped my arms around him.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," I sobbed. Landon wrapped his arms tightly around me as well, burying his head in my shoulder. We stayed like that for a long time before Landon pulled away and wiped at his eyes.

"Come on Harper," he said, his voice wobbly and broken. "Let's get you checked out now."

My head was pounding and I hurt everywhere, especially in my left wrist, but I hadn't wanted to get it checked out. When I had woken up from the hospital room, I didn't give them time to check me out. Instead, I ran to where Willow was and tried to find out if she was okay. Now, I listlessly followed Landon as he put his hand on my back and guided me back to where I was supposed to be getting checked out.

On the way, we passed by Mr. Sisson, who looked so defeated and so much older. Even if he almost never talks, he's always been a really cool guy with dancing gray eyes. Now, they're just sullen and defeated. Looks like I destroyed everyone, I thought bitterly.

"Has someone called Noah?" I asked Landon, my voice barely above a whisper. He moved his arm so that it was around my shoulders. I looked up at him to see sympathy in his eyes as well as sadness. "Yeah, our dad called him as we were headed over here."

I stopped walking and looked at Landon. "So he doesn't know yet?" I squeaked. Realization dawned on Landon as he realized the same thing that I already knew: Noah will hate me for the rest of his life.

I couldn't blame him, though. I hated myself for killing Willow, too. I wish she hadn't been with me, or at least that I was the one to die instead of her. She didn't deserve it. Willow was a wonderful person. She didn't deserve to die.

Damon came into view then, and he immediately came and hugged me, being sure not to hug too tight. I leaned against him and felt his chest vibrate as he spoke to Landon. "I just got back from talking to the police officer," he informed. "He explained that they looked over the accident, talked to eyewitnesses, and interrogated the driver that hit them. The driver confessed to being drunk, and all eyewitnesses agree that he hit them and it couldn't have been prevented."

"Yes, it could have," I mumbled, feeling new tears start to form. Damon pulled away and both he and Landon faced me, concern on their faces. "If I was paying attention, I could have seen him coming, and Willow would still be alive."

"Oh, Harper, no," Damon said as he wrapped his arms around me tightly again. "This isn't your fault. You couldn't have prevented it."

"He's right," Landon said from behind me. I felt him rest his hand on my shoulder before continuing. "I know you might not remember Harper, but I was-"

Landon was interrupted by the sound of a door slamming open. We all turned and saw Noah running towards us, out of breath and scared out of his mind. When he stopped in front of us, he only took a brief moment to look at my disheveled appearance before asking Landon: "Where is mom? Is she okay?"

We were all silent, none of us knowing how to tell him. I felt even more tears well up in my eyes, and my chin began to tremble as I watched Noah's face. He looked at each of us, his eyes ending on me, then realized why we're all so silent. His eyes became distant and misty, the situation sinking in.

I took a step forward as a tear slipped down my cheek. My presence seemed to register to Noah, as his eyes snapped back and his face twisted into rage. He came forward and grabbed me, proceeding to slam me into the wall and pin me there. I screamed out in pain as he reared his hand back to slap me, but Damon and Landon leapt into action. They pulled him off me as Mr. Sisson came around the corner, having heard the commotion.

"Noah, I'm so sorry," I choked out. I didn't mean-"

"It's your fault!" He yelled out, wiggling loose of Damon before Mr. Sisson caught him and held him back. "It's all your fault! She's dead because of you!"

Tears streamed down my face and my body ached everywhere. "You're dead to me! Don't ever come near me again! You murderer!"

I turned and did the one thing I do best; I ran. I ran through the halls and corners and walkways until I reached the elevator. I got in quickly and shut the doors before leaning back on the wall and sinking towards the floor. I sat there crying for another five minutes, replaying the scenario in my head over and over and wishing I had just paid attention to where I was going. Willow would be here, and Noah would still love me instead of wishing I was dead.

The doors to the elevator opened, and I looked up to see Damon come in and sit down next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. "What do you want to do, Harper?" Damon asked softly. I leaned my head against him, wiped away my tears, and closed my eyes. "Go crawl in a hole and die."

"Let's go to your giant hole of a home then," he replied, standing me up and pressing the buttons on the elevator. We walked all the way to his car with his arm around me and me leaning on him for support, and once I was in the car I leaned my head against the window and fell asleep almost immediately, happy to be relieved of the pain all throughout my body and my heart.