Remnant Thoughts

Ribbon (Dialogue)

"You act like the world ends tomorrow." he cracked up as if this was some kind of sick joke.

My face was almost resilient to change, but as I watched him pull out the pack of cigarettes from under the mattress I had raised my eyebrows.

"You smoke?" I barely mumbled out of my clenched jaw.

"I don't," as he placed one between his lips, "until now, I guess. It's not like I'm gonna get lung cancer within a few weeks." he dryly spoke with a chuckle drawn right after.

I tried to muster up a smile to his inexpressive humor, to give some light to his faded color in his eyes, but he had simply kept that dull countenance which had been struck upon him since he was first in the hospital.

"Cancer," I spoke as I felt a rush of heat slam the top of my chest.

"Cancer."

"Are you scared?" I asked.

He runs his hand through his hair. "I don't think so. It's inevitable, my departure is just sooner. Sometimes I try to get there early."

There's a smile on his face, but the weight of his words had still broken down on me.

"You never take anything seriously," I mumbled, but he heard me.

"I took you seriously."

"But you left."

"I was made up of a million mistakes already. I didn't want you to become another one."

"But I did anyways." The words had drifted out of my mouth as I let out a sigh.

"I've always loved you, you know that right?" he smiled at first.

I made an uncomfortable glance at first, but then I proceeded to say "Yeah, yeah, I do know." I watched him take another drag of smoke this time.

"You were a lesson for me, an important one." I had promptly added.

"How so?"

"We were young and stupid. We were incapable of fixing everything that had gone wrong with us because only time could do that. We had just repeatedly hurt one another."

He coughed out some of the smoke filtering out of his mouth, but he nodded. The light from the window had reflected into the room, turning his black hair into a silvery blue, and I almost got caught up on how beautiful he could be sometimes.

I think about this as I snatch away the cigarette from his mouth.

"Sometimes, I wonder if we could've made it. If we weren't so young."

He gives a subtle grin. "Yeah, sometimes I think about it too."