CHARLIE ZUKO

5 | Rizzo

"Slut, Charlie's a slut!"
I walk into the chemistry classroom with people calling 'slut', 'slag' and various other names after me. 4 boys have already asked to have sex with me and it's only 11. I found a pack of condoms in my bag in art. Some clever kid worked out that 'Zuk' rhymes with 'fuck'. Witty, I know.
Mr Walter walks in and everyone shuts up.
"Why are you so quiet?" He says suspiciously.
Nobody answers and so he goes to the board and starts to talk about blast furnaces. He begins the class talking about a diagram of a blast furnace. Apparently, the 'slag is always on the top' because it's less dense or some shit. As you can imagine, a whisper goes round the room and everyone turns to look at me. I look away, lighting a cigarette.
Mr Walter sighs, "You can't smoke in here, Charlie."
Someone shouts out, "Charlie's a hooker!"
"A slag!"
Everyone looks at me, including Mr Walter. "What's going on?"
"Nothing!" I stand up and shout. "All of these idiots seem to think that having sex with more than one person makes you a 'slut'. A bloody slut! Are you calling Kenickie a slut? No! How many girls has he had sex with? Nobody knows! Nobody cares! Patty, you don't care that Danny has had sex with approximately 20 girls when you're flirting with him! So who cares?" I run to the door, grabbing my bag, which loads of condoms fall out of. "Oh, fuck you all!"
"You wish," Some wise guy says.
I roll my eyes, holding back tears, and run out. I hear Mr Walter calling after me but he doesn't follow me. I run to the toilets where no one ever goes. On the way, I meet Kenickie who stops me with his hand on my chest.
"Babe, what's up?"
"I'm- I'm not your babe."
"Is it what people have been saying? Cause baby, you know you-"
"Don't say what you were going to say."
"I just think you're kind of acting slutty."
"And you're not? Don't tell me you care. It's fine when you're getting sex out of it."
"I'm not saying I care, Charlie, I just-"
"You don't understand."
"Help me to."
"I'm a slut, because I've had sex with more than one guy? Is Rizzo a slut?"
"You're acting-"
"DON'T YOU TELL ME HOW I'M ACTING. I've had enough."
I run from his cries and into the bathroom, where I slide myself onto the floor next to the bench, opening the window to smoke out of. After a while, someone comes in. I slide further into the gap so they don't see me. They sit down heavily on the bench and light up a cigarette. I look up. It's Rizzo.
"Oh." She says.
"We need to talk." I sit myself on the bench.
"I'm sorry." We both say.
"It's not your fault." We both reply.
There's a pause.
"I had sex with Kenickie."
"I know."
"Of course you do. Everyone knows."
"The things people are saying about you are horrible, Charlie. I'm sorry."
"I'm okay."
Riz smiles.
"Are you okay, Riz? What upset you at the diner?"
She sighs. "It's nothing-"
"It's something."
"You have to promise not to tell anyone."
"Promise."
"I think I'm pregnant."
"Oh god, Riz. I'm so, so sorry."
"It'll be fine."
"Is it Kenickie's?"
"Nah, you- yeah. It is."
"Riz -" I lean round to hug her.
"We always promised we'd never fight over boys, didn't we?"
"Yes."
"So why did we?"
"I don't know, I just know I'm sorry."
I look at her.
"You don't look pregnant."
"Fuck off." She shoves me, smiling.
"You've not got that pregnant glow."
She laughs and I take a drag of my cigarette.
"Why didn't you apologise for getting milkshake on me?"
"I was mad at you 'cause Kenickie was flirting with you."
"And that started it all. Does he know?"
"No, and I'd like to keep it that way."
"I think-"
"Please."
"Okay Riz, whatever you say."
We sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes.
"Charlie, I'm- I'm scared," Rizzo says, nervously.
"It'd be strange if you weren't."
"I don't know what to do."
"It's okay, Riz. It's all gonna be okay."
"How can it be?"
"I'll look after you. And if you tell Kenickie-"
"I don't want to."
"Okay, okay."
"You won't tell anyone, will you?"
"They'll find out anyway."
"They always find out," there's a pause. "So, you and Kenickie, huh?"
"Oh, Riz, you know that was just to get at you. And we fought."
"When?"
"Like 10 minutes ago."
"Oh, you'd have been cute together."
"Not like you."
"He doesn't kiss me like he kisses you."
"He kisses me like he's paid for me."
"Charlie!"
"He does," I shrug, "He kisses you like he loves you."
"I-"
"I've seen how he looks at you. He loves you, Riz."
"I love him too, Charlie."
"When we - you know - he called me Betty until I told him I was Charlie. Took him a while to get it."
"He did? That's-"
"Cute. It's bloody adorable. And also bloody annoying that he doesn't know my name when he's fucking me."
"Thank you."
"It's okay, Riz."
"I don't know what to do."
"Well, there's homes-"
"I don't, I can't."
"Adoption, women who can't-"
"No, no. All of that time and effort to have it taken away? No."
I sit for a moment, thinking. I'm sure Riz already knows about it but I try, "There's doctors."
"I know."
"Well?" I say gently.
"I suppose I have to."
"You don't-"
"I do, Charlie. I really do."
"I don't know where you can..."
"Neither do I."
"It's really, really dangerous."
"I know.
"It's expensive."
"I know."
"It's-"
"I know."
"Where will you get the money?"
"I've no idea. Oh god, Charlie. I'm such an idiot."
"We'll figure something out."
"I know."
I smile at her and pass her a cigarette.
"Thank you, Charlie."

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