Cold Hearted August

Chapter 3 Bad Decisions. Lara

Ahhhhhhh!

Who the hell does she think she is?

Anger coursed through me as my grip on the steering wheel was turning the color of my knuckles white at that question amongest others repeatedly crossed my mind.

She thought we were friends?

Catalina fricking Evans was that delusional to be under the impression that we in any shape or form are friends or that we were?

My body pulsated as I tore through the streets not caring abouttraffic laws still trying to get the encounter with Catalina out ofmy head as it had managed to resurrect feeling I had long ago buriedand neglected to let surface.

Jesus...

What the hell was that anyway tonight. Sympathy?

Did she pity me or try to show some form of compassion? Because she failed;genuine compassion doesn't need to be brought to public attention. If someone really felt something for someone, then you don't need anyone else to know, not even the person towards whom you're feeling the compassion or empathy.

That thought alone enrage me even more if Catalina believed that after two years an apologize would fix what had happened and make everything better; I hated being pitied it made me feel inferior to everyone else, especially after sophomore year.

That's why I keep my distance and very careful when it comes to whom I get close in my life. Can it be the reason of having the emotionless mask. Being exposed as a weak person is something I can't bear and to think about being put in that position again.

Inevitably I knew I couldn't run forever as the signal to the gas gauge turned on notifying the obvious that my car was running low on gas.

Rolling my eyes I knew I had to pull over and fuel up, even though the rest of me kept screaming to keep going and not stop I didn't want to end up stuck somewhere. Hopefully the somewhat fresh air would hep calm my rattled thoughts as Catalina 's words still rang in my ears clearly, "I defended you!"

That sweet,beautiful and harmonic angel voice was like a symphony composed by the gods that was oddly so calming to my nerves. Even though I did my best to avoid anyone from West Metro and doing so successfully with the minor exception of a few.

Part of me always did secretly want to speak to Catalina . Back then we did have a few classes together and hung out when it was mandatory when I had to go and watch Jennifer and Catalina; along with the rest of the cheerleaders practice, she did try to talk to me and form a friendship. Plus I always thought she was kind of cute too, a major dork at times but I actually found it adorable when she got excited about something.

I know what happened wasn't her fault; What Jennifer had done had nothing to do with Catalina or anyone else but I still blamed Catalina just because of her affiliation to Jennifer.

When mostly I blame myself.

As I started to wallow in my own self-pity and depression I felt my cell vibrating in my jeans; it was a text from my friend Danton.

Danton; Yo where did you go?? Took off like bat outta hell. My place with 411.

My head slowly descended down low; staring at the ground knowing that the rash, if not dramatic exit I made back at Catalina's would have had some repercussions that would have caused a few eyebrows to raise if not some questions along with it.

Sighing inannoyance I really didn't want to go talk about it and just move pasttonight's encounter with Catalina .

Lara; Kay.Be there soon fueling up @ gas station.