The Hijabi's Life(On Hold)

(9)

unedited

Zareefah

___________

I laughed at imaan's joke, as we strolled around the neighbour hood, walking sluggishly, with khaleefah kicking his b-ball, everyone still a bit tired from playing basket ball.

"wanna stop for coffee?" khaleefah asked.

Imaan phone rang, she picked it up, she nodded indicating that we go towards the coffee shop."Zareefah we need to go to the hospital, your mom" Imaan said a little bit panicked from the call.

"...okay "I said when I finally processed what she said.

"let's go to my house it's closer, so we can get a car" he added.

   ******

" Wait khaleefah stop the car" I said

" what?" He asked

"stop the car!" I said

" zareefah really!, why? "iman said

"yeah, I'm not sure I can face it." I said trying to not believe the chaos happening. The picture of my mom in the hospital bed with tubes connected to her in every which way. Of course I'm aware of her health but it just didn't make sense that I could lose her today.

"zareefah  your mom is really in the hospital but you are one of the strongest people I know, you'll get through it...I know you will." she said trying to convince me but my head was just not clear.

" What if it's minor "I said trying think positive, maybe it's minor.....I think......

I hope.......

"zareefah we need to go now, we'll be right by you.... let's go "Khaleefah said, I could sense he was scared too.

"I can't....I just....can't" I said my words breaking, due to the rain about to pour from eyes

" Zareefah, I don't want you regret this for the rest of your life, I get why you're scared but we are all here for you" khaleefah said trying to as much to convince me. I break into sobs "let's go....I need to be next to her" I said feeling worse, cause this problem. there is no running away.

****************

 As we arrived we went to the receptionist .

"hello" said Iman then I saw Maryam." don't worry"Imaan added, the receptionist handed us the visitors stickers. "she is in room 247 upstairs to your right "maryam said leading us to the lift, now I'm starting to feel this is actually real.

We went inside the room , I saw my mom lying helplessly on the bed and dad beside her with Haydar praying. "Mom "I said as  my eyes got teary,

"dad.... what happened" I asked not even seeing him clearly as I rushed to her side.

"you know her cancer, she has dying cells and they are killing her living ones" dad said.

I went up to my mom, "mom "I said as I felt my eyes clouding with more tears

 Suddenly her  doctor came "Is she up "the doctor asked, "yes"dad answered, eager to hear good news

"We've run some tests......you have to say your goodbyes" the doctor said checking her d.p, and asking for my dads attention.

After waiting for an hour, she finally talks. "Zareefah !"she called in a torn voice." Is that ... zaree...fah" she asked, coughing.

"Yes mama, you're not going to die just hope.insha'Allah mama you'll be fine....please.please don't.leave.me....pleas "I said, barely in a whisper.

" No zareefah, you are my only daughter,how can I ever leave you.You have to pray for me, when I die. Everyone has his time and my time has come......witnessing your wedding was all I ever dreamed of, because I thought it will bring joy to your eyes..I can't experience that" she said as more tears flowed."....smile for me habibty, smile."she added still placing her cold hands on zareefah's warm one's. zareefah felt her lips twitch into a smile.

"call khalili (her nickname for khaleefah)",she said tears streaming down her dewy eyes.

"Khalili, I want you to hold her tight when she is down, give her hope, shine your bright light on her, take ...care of her...and may we all meet in jannah ." she said coughing, I suddenly heard beeping sounds from the machine and i knew exactly what it indicated

"Innallilahi wainnailaihirajiuun" I said tears flowed but I felt numb,should I cry?should I run?should I hold her close?

The doctor came rushing through with some nurses and I slid down, I slid down on the floor. khaleefah held me tight and said," I know you are strong, fast and furious, am so sorry, come on let's go get some fresh air "he said.I agreed after I prayed for my mom.

  We went outside, I sobbed and cried till I got a great headache, but khaleefah was holding me tight."am here for you okay, just like you were there for me every other day" he said wiping my tears

A/N I know, I know, but don't you think her death will bring them closer. Hope you understand *puppy eyes* don't kill me please and pardon me don't really know how a dying scene works

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