hometown // ethan cutkosky

15

blake;
goodnight babes, hope you got home safe.

i threw my phone on the bed as ethan sat on my desk. "where are your parents?" he asked. i shrugged. "there always out." i grab a more comfortable shirt. "promise you wont turn around." i say as his back is facing me and he's doing something at my desk. "promise." i turn around too and take off my shirt fast and put on my other shirt. "you're good." i turn around. i start walking over to him. and notice he's looking at a frame.

"thats me, ashley, and you." i said in the order we were standing in. "woah. you look different." he looked back. "yeah, i mean, you hardly remember me." i smiled a bit. "yeah, but i just... you bring memories back." he looked back at the framed picture and smiled. "i do?" i smile a bit bigger. he nodded and looked over at me. "thanks." we made hard eye contact.

he started to lean in, everything was going in slow motion. and we kissed. i pulled him back because of blake. "sorry.", "no, don't be ethan." i giggled.

"ill keep it between us." i said feeling guilty. he got up from the chair. he couldn't look at me. "ill go." he shyly said as he got more red than he already was. he left and i was in shock. i don't know why i'm reacting so late, but it just all now hitting me.

-

it was sunday and i got my daily good morning text, but i didn't reply. i just, need space. im still weirded out from last night. and i couldn't sleep at all yesterday. i just kept on thinking about ethan. and why the fuck he would kiss me.

its like, i like ethan. but ashley, and i just keep denying it. but i really like ethan.

i shut my eyes.

blake. if he's really the one— who am i kidding. why did ethan have to kiss me. i grab a pillow and press it against my face. and if i tell blake he'll probably go all ape shit.

i need to think. i get up and got ready. i didn't know where i was going. but i wasn't gonna stay where ethan kissed me. i needed that off of my mind.

i wasn't gonna reply to anymore nor answer any calls. just probably my family. i plugged in my headphones and pressed shuffle.

nineteen - lil peep

started playing.

"i dont wanna lose you, i dont wanna hate you, i dont wanna do you like that." i started singing along as i walked out the door.

"why you gotta do me like that?" i sang along. letting my feet take me where ever they want too.

after tons of tomppabeats, the neighbourhood, joji, frank ocean, and much more artists i made it to a vintage looking record shop. i walked in and took out my ear buds. there was about 6 people in the small shop.

i noticed a girl with grey hair with a regular looking boy. "i like your hair." i smiled. "thanks, i like your shirt." she pointed at it causing me to look down reminding me im wearing a mustard yellow a bit distressed shirt. i looked back up and smiled "thanks." i giggled a bit.

"im violet.", "im andrea.", "and this is austin." i looked over to the boy who was looking away awkwardly.