Cursed Rings ❅ Vikturi

4) Love And Life

A/N Hi! This is CheshireCatLife! How's life, people? LilzIsTrash wrote this chapter and I love it so enjoy! Without further ado, here's chapter four!

Viktor pulled out his phone, having nothing else to do to distract him from his pain. He immediately clicked on his email and was greeted with a horrible sight. His hands trembled again as he clicked on the email sent from Yuri.

He read it, his eyes threatening to let out the tears inside of them, but he kept his composure. He decided to do something. To take a risk. He clicked on the reply button, the button that would decide the near future.

Yuri,

I'm busy at the moment, but I want you to know that this was all a misunderstanding. I did mean to visit sooner, but I ended up getting caught up in recent events that I haven't been able to. I apologize, and I will make sure to keep in touch the best that I can. I am sorry, I have to go now.

With love,

Viktor

He let out a sigh and pressed send. After a few seconds of loading, it finally did send. He let out a sigh and started to head back to the rink. He felt a bit better, but he wasn't sure if what he had just done was right. He had a feeling that something was off, but that didn't matter at the moment. He needed to gain control of himself once more before the season started. maybe watching the other skaters could help him.

-

Yuri stood in front of his mirror, looking at himself in disgust. He had been exercising a lot lately, yet he only seemed to be gaining more weight. It wasn't too noticeable yet but was still a fact. He let out a sigh and then heard a distant 'ding' come from his computer. It was a new email. He left the bathroom and dragged himself to his computer.

From: ViktorNikiforov@YOI.com

He immediately clicked on the email and read it. After he had finished, however, so many of his questions we're still left unanswered, and he searched desperately for some sign that Viktor still cared about him.

He reread the message over and over again, but he couldn't find it. He felt rage, sadness, and doubt fill him up, clouding his common sense. There was nothing, nothing but Viktor's signature, that showed he still cared about Yuri. Sure, the signature said 'With Love', but that meant nothing to Yuri. Viktor probably used that to sign off all of his responses, so it was dull and meaningless. Yuri let out a yell of anger, and dug his nails into the wooden desk, leaving marks. He was pissed, angry, and filled with hatred. He hated Viktor, hated himself, hated everything. He needed air, but he didn't want to go or in public. That would only make things worse. He couldn't ice skate either, not now at least.

He sat up in anger, sending the chair falling backward. He didn't bother to pick it up however, he wasn't in the mood to care what mess he made. He paced back and forth in the room, his hands clenched into fists and his teeth clenched together. He could practically feel himself shaking with rage, and he hated that also. He hated being angry, it didn't suit him, but he couldn't help it anymore.

Anger is a funny thing. There are many different levels to it, it's not just a one type thing. Now, Yuri was the angriest he had ever felt in his life. He wanted to scream, to throw something, to cry, to attack someone. To send someone flying through the depths of hell. He couldn't however, he was alone in this tiny closed off space and his only friends that lived there were gone on a trip.

He had been broken so many times, it had just become part of his life, something to expect, but this was different. This wasn't just any person who had broken him, it was Viktor, the one person he had felt love for. He glared at his desk, where the ring that he had lied about giving away lay. It glistened in the sunlight, the brightest thing in that dull room. He hated it, though. Yuri hated the ring and everything that it stood for. The love that had left him like this, the man that had broken him twice, the pitiful past that he had with that man. He walked over to it, gritting his teeth in anger.

However, he couldn't bring himself to hurt it or give it up, however. There was something about it, something that made him still want to keep it. He let out a sigh, and the emotions that he felt were revealed in the sigh. He unclenched his fists and looked at the computer. It was still open in the email, and Yuri didn't know what to do. He wanted to ignore it, let it just stay there unanswered, but he also had so much to say. He looked at his feet, and he could feel the stinging of tears that threatened to spill.

His hands returned to their clenched state, and he gritted his teeth once more. He had been such a failure to Viktor, it was no wonder that Viktor had left him like this. He would never meet Victors standards, never be able to regain the man he had lost. He collapsed onto the floor, not being able to hold his sobs back anymore. He curled up into a ball, and let his sobs break free.

Little did he know, he wasn't the only one hurting.

-

Viktor watched the other skaters, wondering what motivated them to skate. He had seemed to have lost all his motivation, and he tried to remember what motivated him before he had met the Japanese skater.

"Love and life."

Those words didn't have the same meaning as they did back then. Now, they hurt. They hurt him so much because now they meant Yuri. Yuri was his life, his love, his motivation, and because of his stupid mistakes, he had lost him. He wanted so badly to go and see him, to change all his past mistakes, but now that was impossible.

You can't turn back time.

Victor started to feel sick, and his breathing became faster. He went to go sit on one of the benches, trying to calm down, but it only helped a little bit. He did his best to slow down his breathing, but he felt trapped in this area, even though it was so large. Yakov glanced at him and gestured for him to leave, and Viktor gladly did so.

He stumbled outside, breathing in the fresh air. He felt exhausted and sick but at least he was breathing more normally now. He needed rest. He heard the doors slam open and saw a grumpy Yurio walking out toward him.

"Get in the car old man, Yakov told me to drive you to your apartment." He growled, forcing Viktor to move towards the car. Once the were both in the car, Yurio started the engine and they drove in silence.

Once they made it, and Viktor had left the car, Yurio drove off without a word. Viktor sighed and entered his apartment room, and collapsed on the couch. After a few minutes, he was asleep.

Love and life had a completely new meaning now. 

word count: 1253

published: 03.04.17