Blinded (z.h)

s i x

It was eight in the evening when I got back to our dorm. I unlocked the door with my key and stepped inside, finding no trace of Niall.

"Niall?" I called, my voice echoing through the rooms. "Niall!" I received no answer.

I heavily sighed as I ripped off my jacket, throwing it on the couch, then made my way to the bathroom. I looked at the mirror to find someone I couldn't recognize. He looked just like me, but his eyes were all red and trails of tears were dried on his cheeks and stubble. "God damn," I groaned, turning on the faucet and splashing my face with cold water.

Why am I so upset? I've never acted this way for anyone before. What's so different about Niall?

This has gotten out of hand. It started out as just an innocent crush, but now? It's taking over my life. I have to do something about this.

But I can't do anything—he likes Harry, not me.

I flicked the bathroom's light switch off and walked to the kitchen, taking the note that I had previously left for Niall off of the fridge and ripping it, then disposing it. I went to my bedroom, pulling my phone out of my back pocket. I dialed Niall's number as I jumped on the bed and cuddled up in the blankets. After the first three rings, he finally picked up.

"Hello?" He asked in an amused voice, like he had been laughing before he picked up the phone.

I rolled my eyes, thankful that Niall wasn't here to see my action. "Hey, Niall. I just wanted to know when you're coming home. You've been out for a while," I said monotonously into the phone.

"Oh, sorry, man! I hadn't realized the time! You must've be worried sick."

"Not in particular." I wasn't lying. The only thing I was was pissed off.

"Oh," Niall said surprised. "Are you mad at me?"

"No," I lied. "I just wanted to know when you're coming back home, that's all."

"Oh, well, I'm coming back soon." He lowered his voice before saying, "Boy, do I have a lot to tell you about!"

"Save it, Horan. I'm going to sleep right now. I'll see you in the morning."

"Oh, uh, okay, I guess. Bye, Zaynie."

"Bye," I muttered, shutting off my phone, then throwing it across the room. "It's not fair!" I screamed as I sat up and punched my pillows. "Why can't I be in love? Why can't I have a happy ending? Why, why, why?"

I heard a bang from upstairs, followed by a muffled "Shut up!"

"Fuck you!" I yelled back. My throat was burning and my breath was shaking; I was a total mess. I choked back a sob and I sunk into the sheets of my bed, wiping the tears on my cheeks messily. I wrapped myself in the sheets and closed my eyes, hoping to easily be put to sleep.

I can't just live like this everyday. I can't just watch Niall fall in love while I suffer alone.

I have to get over him.