In Love with a Male Stripper

Chapter Two

"Dick's Nutting Goods is the best!" He exclaimed

"Hello, good sir, welcome to the best Nutting Goods in history! We have a sale on everything in the 'sticky' and 'STD' aisles." an employee greets Edgar.

"Oh boy! I can't wait to get in on these sweet deals."

"And I can't wait to get in on these sweet nuts!"

'The fuck is this guy yapping on about? What a fuckin cunt.' Edgar thought to himself.

Edgar made his way into the 'sticky' aisle. There were many sticky things in there. One of which, being a salamander.

"Hello there cute little booger!" Edgar laughed at the green salamander as it squirmed around. Edgar instantly fell in love. He will adopt this salamander. Edgar loves him some salamanders.

"I will name you Dicky" Edgar whispered to his slimy friend, and quickly left to look for a store clerk to assist him with his salamander.

"Excuse me, miss?"

A lady who's nametag read 'Bianca Buttstuff' raced over to Edgar. "Yes, how may i help you?"

"Well you see, i'd like to adopt this lovely salamander friend over here."

"Oh yes!" Bianca cheered. "He's a cutie pie, isn't he?"

"Abso-fuckin-lutely" Edgar was hyped. "His name is Dicky."

"Wow, what a name!"

"Lmao truuuu. Does that word...interest you?"

"Uhhh, I'll have to say yes and no. Yes in general, no to you."

#getshrektedgaryoumotherfuckincunt

"*ahem*, well, I'll just be taking my salamander and be on my way."

"I think that'd be great."

And around that moment, the narrators had realized...fuck Edgar. What a cunt.

Edgar headed to the STD aisle, where he picked up his favorite drink and deodorant, canned AIDS. If one one were to ask why he also bought the drink form of AIDS, he would respond by smiling and simply saying "I like to drink AIDS to fulfill my dream of passing it along to someone else." Edgar was a very weird little man, but this is just the beginning of his edgy little story. There is much more action, thrills, memes, and most of all, edge on the way!