Who I've Become

Chapter 4

My two roommates and I lightly walked around the big dorm room, exploring where we would be living for the next year.

“I wonder if there are any guys here,” Kris asked suggestively, and I just gaped at her comment because I was never so open about those kinds of feelings, but I guess I’d get used to it.

“Even if there are, they’re probably all nerds. I mean, why would they be here anyway?” Shay teased. We all looked around for a good minute before realizing if people were moving in, they still were in their dorms.

“Well, lets go outside. We can look around the campus,” I suggested.

         The cold November air bit at our faces, staining them a light red. Kristin shoved her hands deeper into her sweatshirt, glancing quickly at the brick buildings that divided the school and the rest of whatever town we were in.

Suddenly, I heard Shay murmur something I couldn’t quite make out. That was until I saw Kris quickly adjust herself to look at whoever was coming towards us. I looked up to see a boy around our age coming from around the corner of an old, beautiful house. He had long, light brown hair that contrasted with his dark green eyes. He was tall and seemed completely perfect as I admittedly stared at him. Not having the most experience with guys, I could feel my face getting red. Shay noticed me and Kris staring at the boy and apparently decided to take things into her own hands whispering, “Watch this.”

 Although she wore dark, Goth clothes she demolished all stereotypes being loud and bubbly. Shay put her skirt into good use as she strode over to the tall, lean guy.

“Hey! Are you in this school?” She straight out asked him, while I was to shy to even look in his intense eyes. I knew I was supposed to ditch my shyness, but a girl can only change so much. Kris widened her eyes and mouthed to me “Oh my Gosh!” All I could do to respond was nod and wait for what else Shay was going to say.

“Oh, yeah I am. You just got here too, right?” The guy’s gentle voice ventured off to start a conversation. I couldn’t help but start looking him over again. Thankfully, Shay answered, snapping me out of my trance.

“Yup! I’m Shay,” she extended her long, lean hand to meet his outstretched one. “And this is Kris, and that’s Carry.” She continued, pointing to each of us. He almost looked at us with hope as he replied.

“I’m Sam. Nice to meet you.” The attractive boy looked at me in the eyes as he reached to shake my hand. Oh God, please don’t mess up. I forced myself to look up at him as I shook his warm, perfect hand.

“Nice to meet you too…” I trailed off, already daydreaming about him. I didn’t even notice when Kris dragged me away, exchanging goodbyes. Randomly, Shay started giggling, which soon turned into full out laughter. “What?” I asked, realizing that it must have been about me.

“No nothing, but could you have been any more obvious?” she continued through her snorts and short laughs. “Oh my young grasshoppers, you have a lot to learn.” She walked off, leaving me and Kris wondering what she had in store for us.

         I couldn’t get Sam’s intense, green eyes out of my mind all night long. While Kris and Shay were becoming closer and closer with stories from back home, I was replaying him shaking my hand with his perfect one like a broken record. I knew this was completely foolish; I know it was only a handshake but it still had me blushing with pleasure at how sincere he seemed. “Hey, Carry! Earth to Carry?” Someone snapped her fingers in my face, ruining my daydream. “What’s up, I mean, you keep blushing and you haven’t even been listening at all have you?” Finally, I looked over to see a curious Shay staring at me.

         “Um, not really.” I admitted sheepishly, feeling plain dumb. I wanted to drop the fact that I was completely overreacting over this, but for some reason Sam and my roommates made me hopeful that this school year would be different.

         “Well then, what have you been thinking of all night?” Kris exclaimed, making me laugh.

         “Wait, it not about that guy we saw outside, is it?” Shay guessed perfectly, making me hide my face in my familiar pillow and hearing squeals from the two beside me.

         “I can’t help it! Did you see his eyes? Did you see him?!” I defended myself, hearing my roommates contemplate where I was coming from. Then I heard Shay and Kris whisper to each other, causing me to look up in suspicion of what they could be planning. “What?”

         “Well, if you really are obsessing over him, I guess we will have to find a way to talk to him more.” Shay mischievously replied, making me shriek, surprising myself. Of course, Jasmine had to walk in right at that moment, raising a perfectly manicured eyebrow at me.

         “How old are you? I mean, really.” She spat at me, causing me to cringe as if she’d slapped me. Sure, I was used to some of my previous classmates making fun of me for being a “nerd” or whatever else they called me, but Jasmine shot those words at me with pure disgust. 

         Shay just rolled her eyes, exhaustedly asking her, “What is your problem, Jas? Come on, you’re stuck with us for at least a year and you might as well get along with us. I’ll start: This is Kris, and this is—”

In that split second, I realized I had to gain this girl’s respect.   

         “Carry! I’m Carry.” I awkwardly extended my hand out, hoping she would take it as a peace offering. I could tell she was a little impressed, as she nodded curtly instead of managing to insult me. Jasmine then flipped her pin straight hair, exposing an expensive Tiffany necklace. She looked like a typical Californian rich girl; Jasmine wore a Ralph Lauren sweater with an even preppier skirt and perfect nails. Usually this would have intimidated already, but I knew I had support from her sister and Kris.

         “Well, if you are that desperate to get that guy to notice you, make sure you leave an impression on him in class tomorrow.” With that, she turned around and walked back out the door, leaving my mouth hanging open after her.